Tag Archives: Judge

Testimony & Verdict

Testimony & Verdict (CaD Jhn 21) Wayfarer

Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written.
John 21:25 (NIV)

Last year I had the opportunity to give a legal deposition. It was my first time doing so, and it was an interesting experience giving testimony before a judge, court recorder, and opposing attorneys. Before the deposition, I found myself thinking a lot about the way I wanted to respond to questions. My prevailing desire was to keep my answers very clear and concise, sticking to what I knew was true based on my experience.

Today’s chapter concludes John’s account of Jesus’ story, and it ends with a fascinating bit of hyperbole observing that if every story about Jesus were written down all the world’s libraries couldn’t hold the sheer volume. That final thought reminds me as a reader that in writing his account, John had a difficult task. How do I testify to everything I saw, heard, and experienced as a disciple of Jesus in a way that is clear, concise, and communicates what is true? In crafting his testimony, John let specific numbers guide him.

Numbers play a role throughout the Great Story. Even the most casual reader will notice the recurrence of certain numbers. Different numbers have particular symbolic meanings. The number seven, for example, signifies completeness as in the seven days of creation after which God considered creation complete and called it “very good.” Three is considered a divine number as in the number of the Trinity: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost.

John appears to have been conscious of these numbers in structuring his testimony. He chose seven “signs” or miracles to share as well as seven “I am” statements that Jesus made. Three also makes recurring appearances as in sharing three times the risen Jesus appeared to the disciples. It’s as if John structured his testimony using those numbers as a guide to provide a “complete” and “divine” account to his readers.

John ends his account by describing the events of the third time the risen Jesus was present with the disciples. John lists seven of the disciples who went fishing on the Sea of Galilee. After getting skunked all night, morning arrives and Jesus calls to them from shore, telling them to cast their net on the right side of the boat. When they did there were so many fish in the net they couldn’t pull the haul into the boat. They had to tow it to the shore where they found Jesus was making a breakfast of grilled fish and bread (a little homage to the feeding of the 5,000 with fish and bread that John described back in chapter six).

John then shares that Jesus asked Peter to affirm his love three times, followed by three commands to Peter to “feed” and “take care” of Jesus’ “sheep.” Peter denied Jesus three times. With three affirmations and commands, Peter is restored to his position of leadership among the disciples. Jesus then foreshadows for Peter that he will one day follow Jesus in stretching out his hands in crucifixion. When Peter asks Jesus about John’s fate, Jesus says, “What’s it to you if I want him to live until I return?”

John is admittedly addressing what may have been a couple of FAQs of his contemporary first-century believers. He states quite directly that rumors were saying that he wouldn’t die, and he puts that rumor to rest. I also wonder if there weren’t those who wondered, “Why is Peter the leader of the Jesus Movement if he denied Jesus?” John’s final chapter would quell any doubt about Peter being Jesus’ appointed, “rock solid” leader.

In the quiet this morning, I am reflecting on this chapter-a-day trek through John. I have been struck this time by the beautiful and thoughtful way that John structured his account and emphasized his testimony to the truth of what he witnessed. This is John’s deposition. He uses the noun for “witness” or “testimony” 14 times and the verb for “testify” 33 times. I find upon reflection that he has given clear and concise testimony to what he knew to be true about Jesus based on his experience.

Once again, as a reader, he leaves me to decide if I believe his testimony and what verdict I will personally render regarding the question “Who is Jesus?”

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

Lost

Lost (CaD Lk 15) Wayfarer

But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, “This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.”
Luke 15:2 (NIV)

I woke up on Christmas morning before the rest of the household. Historically, this is a usual daily occurrence. As I mentioned in my last post, however, our kids and grandkids moved back from Scotland and in with us for the foreseeable future. They are still trying to adjust their biological clocks to Central Daylight Time. So, after a week of waking to grandkids fully awake and ready to party, a little quiet before the Christmas chaos was a welcome treat.

I unexpectedly found myself reading an article by a gentleman named Paul Kingsnorth published in The Free Press. An Irishman, Kingsnorth tells his story of growing up an avowed atheist and environmentalist whose path led him to Buddhism before becoming immersed in a Wiccan coven. Eventually, Kingsnorth found himself in the last place he ever thought he’d be: following Jesus in an Orthodox tradition. From the editor’s introduction:

“Here is how Paul describes himself: ‘I am an animist in an age of machines; a poet-of-sorts in a dictatorship of merchants; a believer in a culture of cynics. Either I’m mad, or the world is.’ He continues: ‘My most strongly-held belief is this: that our modern crisis is not economic, political, scientific or technological, and that no ‘answers’ to it will be found in those spheres. I believe that we are living through a deep spiritual crisis; perhaps even a spiritual war. My interest these days is what this means.’”

Kingsnorth’s story was an unexpected and meaningful start to my Christmas Day. This morning, I returned to the quiet (Keep sleeping, kiddos!) and today’s chapter. Dr. Luke begins by describing how Jesus made it a regular habit to hang out with “tax collectors and sinners.” He regularly accepted invitations to dine with wealthy tax collectors. I can’t help but think Matthew was well-networked in that particular community and helped make the introductions. This earned Jesus the judgemental critique of the good religious who self-righteously treated these “sinners” as social lepers who might sully their well-manicured and whitewashed religious facades.

Luke then records Jesus telling a trifecta of parables. The parables tell of a lost sheep, a lost coin, and a lost son. The common theme of these three parables reveals the heart of God contrasted against the attitudes of the institutions of religion represented by Jesus’ most vehement critics. Christianity is routinely criticized, satirized, and dismissed for its judgemental, often hypocritical, condemnation of both sin and sinners. In many cases, I find it well deserved.

All the way back at the beginning of the Great Story, God creates the universe and everything in it. He looks at His creation and calls it “good.” Then God caps creation off with his most beloved and intimately crafted work, Adam and Eve. He looks at His creation including humanity and calls it “very good.”

Both Jesus’ words and actions reveal the heart of the Creator. The tax collectors and sinners He dined with were the very work of His hands, beautifully and wonderfully crafted. Jesus looks at the sinners, prostitutes, and greedy tax collectors sitting around the table with Him and His heart finds that His most beloved and intimately crafted works are spiritually lost.

As Jesus tells his trinity of lost parables, He repeatedly says that there is more rejoicing in heaven over one “lost” person who is “found” than in a whole church full of faithful followers who are already in the fold.

In the quiet, my mind wanders back to Paul Kingsnorth’s story. I wander back to my own story. One of the things you’ll commonly hear in the stories of those who find Jesus is that we know it was Jesus who found us. It was Jesus who sought and doggedly pursued our lost souls.

As a disciple of Jesus, I find in His stories and actions the example He wants me to follow. It lies at the foundation of Jesus’ teaching about loving my enemies and blessing those who hate me. If they are simply condemned sinners going to hell then I will find in them what I believe to be an exemption to Jesus’ command. I will believe that I have found a loophole in Jesus’ law of love. If, however, I see those condemned sinners as Jesus sees them, as His own lost creations whom He lovingly and intimately crafted, then I will see them, think of them, speak to them, and treat them differently. I must see them as my Master sees them. I must see them as I see my former self…

“I once was lost, but now I’m found,
was blind, but now I see.”

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

A New Org Chart

If you fear the Lord and serve and obey him and do not rebel against his commands, and if both you and the king who reigns over you follow the Lord your God—good!
1 Samuel 12:14 (NIV)

One of the more fascinating parts of my job is getting to observe and experience many different company cultures. I have learned a lot about both leadership and how systems function from being in the trenches with many different companies large and small.

Once we were hired to help a company improve their customer satisfaction and customer service. Our survey of the company’s customers revealed a lot of room for improvement. Customer Satisfaction was low, and there were a few major things customers didn’t like. Our assessment of recorded phone calls between the company’s customers and the Customer Service team revealed that there were huge disparities in service quality between service reps, and some customers were getting such bad service experience as to make them detractors.

As we began working with the leadership team to address some of the issues, I quickly learned that the company was a mess internally. The long-time CEO of the company set an example of management by power, fear, and intimidation. The rest of the company followed suit. The org chart was a mess. Silos in the organization worked against one another. Front line managers directly reported to multiple superiors and simply answered the loudest threats each day.

The sign on the wall said that they were committed to exceptional customer service, but the entire organization was built in such a way as to make exceptional customer service an impossibility.

Today’s chapter is another key episode in the transition of the Hebrew system of government from a tribal theocracy to a national monarchy. The org chart is changing. In the old org chart, God was recognized as King. Then came a Judge (Samuel was the last) who was recognized as the one God had raised to lead and deliver the tribes along with a tribal council of elders. From there, each tribe had its own governance.

Today, Samuel lays out the new org chart. King Saul will now be at the top of the org chart and all the tribes will be ruled by him. Yet Samuel is quick to remind his people that God is still above King Saul on the org chart. The new monarchy will only work well if both the King and the people will serve the Lord with all their hearts and avoid the worship of idols.

As for Samuel? He makes it clear that there’s a new role on the org chart. He is giving up civil governance, but he’s taking up the mantel of spiritual leadership:

As for me, far be it from me that I should sin against the Lord by failing to pray for you. And I will teach you the way that is good and right.

From this point forward, the nation would have prophets in the org chart who would directly report to God, and they will be God’s spiritual mouthpiece to both the King and the people. Future Kings would also assemble “yes men” prophets who would be subordinate to them and tell them what they want to hear, but God would ensure that His prophets would speak His words even if it wasn’t what the King wanted to hear.

One of the things I’ve learned in my career is that companies typically don’t make dramatic changes in corporate culture unless the person at the top of the org chart is driving it. The company I mentioned at the top of this post was a great example of that. The CEO had created a culture that worked against what they claimed to be the company values. If the CEO doesn’t change, the organization isn’t going to change either.

In the quiet this morning, I’m thinking about the org chart of my own life. As a follower of Jesus, I’m called to make Jesus the Lord of my life. Like Samuel reminded Saul, God is at the top of the org chart. And yet, like the old Kings of Israel, I have the autonomy to either obediently submit myself to God’s authority or to pay lip service to God while I willfully do my own thing. I can also do a little of both.

That leads me to ask myself some tough questions here in the quiet. Where am I being obedient? Where am I simply paying lip service? Some days I need a fresh reminder that God is at the top of my life’s org chart.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

For the Good of the Whole

The Lord said to Moses, “Say to the Israelites: ‘Any man or woman who wrongs another in any way and so is unfaithful to the Lord is guilty and must confess the sin they have committed. They must make full restitution for the wrong they have done….'”
Numbers 5:5-7 (NIV)

Many of the client offices in which I’ve worked over the years are cramped quarters. Numerous people work in confined spaces with little barrier between desks. During the winter months it is quite common to hear stories of entire departments decimated by the flu or other viruses that spread quickly with little or no warning. Over the years when I’ve found myself with a nasty bug I have felt compelled to call clients and explain, “You don’t want me visiting you right now.” I can’t remember a single client who wasn’t grateful for me being considerate of their operation and team members.

When reading through the ancient marching orders for the Hebrew nation in the book of Numbers it’s easy to for me to find myself perplexed in the simple reading of the text. It is so easy to read it from a 21st century American perspective and scratch my head. There is little connection between me (the modern, western technological age reader) and a nomadic nation of semitic people in Arabia around 3500 years ago.

Stepping back and looking at today’s chapter as a whole, the rules prescribed through Moses had to do with things that were threats to their community, starting with that which was physical and easy to see and ending with that which was relational and much harder to judge.

It begins with that which was physical and quite easy to diagnose. In that time period infectious disease could wipe out an entire people in little or no time. While my cold virus might wreak havoc on my client’s workforce and productivity, in the days of Moses a nasty virus could bring death and plague to the entire nation. So, those who showed clear physical sign of what might be a disease were to be quarantined outside the camp. Next came the broad category of “wronging” another member of the community. I think of this as the type of neighborly disputes that might end up in small claims court at my local courthouse. Finally, the bulk of the chapter deals with the most intimate and difficult things to know or to judge: marital infidelity.

It’s easy as a modern reader to get mired in the struggle to understand rules made for an ancient, middle-eastern culture. Wendy and I had a fascinating discussion over coffee last week about the historical and cultural contexts of these rules. Still, I walk away from today’s chapter reminded that all cultures need laws, rules, and regulations that protect the good of the community.  Infectious disease, personal disputes, and the breakdown of marriage all have consequences that  radiate throughout the community. God through Moses prescribed very specific ways to determine and deal with them for the good of the whole.

This morning I’m thankful to live in a community with a strong system of law that protects our community, state, and nation as a whole. I’m also reminded this morning of my individual responsibility to be considerate of my community as a whole. In fact, I report for jury duty in two weeks.

From Monochrome to Living Color

You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.
Romans 2:1 (NIV)

When I was a young man first endeavoring to follow Jesus, life was far more monochromatic. I was unaware just how black and white my world really was. I delineated life into binary camps: good and evil, godly and ungodly, believers and unbelievers, things allowed and things not allowed, right and wrong.

Towards the end of his ministry, Jesus said that He would, on the day of Judgement, divide the nations into sheep and goats. Those on His right would go to their reward in eternity and those on His left would go to the fire prepared for the devil and his angels. One of the most important lessons, and one that is oft forgotten, is that judgement will be Jesus’ job.

The further I get on this life journey, the more clearly I see that when I presume to sit in judgement on others I am presuming to take up Jesus’ job. If I presume to do Jesus’ job for Him then I am setting myself up to be equal to Him; making myself God. That is really the core sin of Eden. Therefore, when I do this I am proving exactly the opposite of what I presume. When I presume to sit in judgement on others I am proving that I am as much a sinner in need of salvation as the person I condemn.

Life is much less monochromatic than it used to be. While there are things that I can perceive are still clearly black and white in this world, my view from the path is a colorful place with infinite hues. I seem to have lost my label maker somewhere along the way, and I haven’t really missed it. Life is an interesting place, a mysterious place, a beautiful place. I find that I am more fascinated and feel less need to understand. I am more intrigued and feel less need to be convinced. I am more given more to faith and less concerned with my doubts. I am more given to grace and am happy to let Jesus have the job of Judge.

 

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featured image: vinothchandar via Flickr

The Latest 11-22-2015

Madison has her wings!
Our birthday girl!

Today is our daughter Maddy Kate’s 24th Birthday!! I have to send a shout out to her. Madison has diligently focused her life on graduating from the University of Colorado at Colorado Springs in December. Between school and flying the friendly skies, she’s been such a busy girl. We’re so proud of her and can’t wait to see where God leads her in her impending new stage of life. 🙂

It seems like I’ve been unusually haphazard with posting the last couple of weeks. To be honest, the switch back to regular time from Daylight Savings Time has thrown my body off more than usual this year. I’ve always been a morning person, but I’ve been having a hard time pulling myself out of bed in the mornings and so I’ve missed a few mornings.

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Wendy and I enjoyed celebrating her brother, Lucas’ Birthday at Hickory Park in Ames. We also had the opportunity to meet his fiancé, Brooke, for the first time. After dinner we got a tour of the Greek Orthodox Church that he is helping to fix up in Ames and the parsonage where he lives with a couple of other guys from Iowa State.

My friend, Matthew Burch, and I were scheduled to present our More Than Conqueror’s men’s conference at Westview Church in Waukee on Nov 13-14, but it was rescheduled due to a tragic death in the Westview family and the funeral that had to be scheduled that Saturday. We’re looking at a date in January or February. Stay tuned.

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Pella’s Tulip Court for 2016.

Me with my fellow judges Doug and Chad. We were three of about 30 or more judges for the evening.
Me with my fellow judges Doug and Chad. We were three of about 30 or more judges for the evening.

Last weekend I had the opportunity to be a judge for Pella’s Tulip Queen. We got to meet each of the 13 ladies for a brief personal interview. We then judged their presentation before the Tulip Queen and her court were announced at the end of the evening. It was a great experience, and I was amazed at the amazing group of capable young ladies. Any one of them would have represented our community well. It was hard having to see eight of them be disappointed, but so proud of our 2016 Hollandse Magdz.

Speaking of Pella, a shout out to the boys’ football team who won their second State Championship in a row on Thursday night. Wendy and I had to record the game, but we stayed up late to cheer them on. Well done, boys!

Even though the men’s conference got cancelled, I had plenty of opportunities to speak this past week. I gave the morning message in the Auditorium at Third Church last week. On Monday I left at 4:30 a.m. to make the four hour drive to Sioux Center where I presented two training sessions for a client. Then drove home. Long day. Then on Wednesday evening I spoke to the high school group at Third.

We headed to Theatre Central’s production of Lion in Winter on Thursday evening. A few of the cast members were in Ah, Wilderness! with me back in 2013 and it was fun to see them on stage.

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On Friday night Wendy and I had our Open House and Stock the Bar party here at VW Manor. Murphy’s Law struck and Iowa got pounded with our first snow storm of the season. We forged ahead with our party and were pleased at the number of hardy souls who braved the elements to join us. We got the chance to meet several of our neighbors whom we had yet to meet. Our house was packed, and the bar definitely got broken in. Of course, Wendy had an amazing spread of snacks and desserts and everyone had a good time!

Unshackled

This matter arose because some false believers had infiltrated our ranks to spy on the freedom we have in Christ Jesus and to make us slaves. Galatians 2:4 (NIV)

As an actor, I was trained to dig into a character’s motivation and what makes him or her tick. Why do they act the way they do? What is it that he or she wants? What drives him or her to do that? The result is that Wendy and I find ourselves constantly observing people and discussing what it is that seems to motivate them. It’s not about being critical, in fact it’s just the opposite. Rather than observing a person’s behavior and immediately judging the person based merely on our reaction to his or her behavior, we try to genuinely gain a better understanding of why that person behaves the way they do.

Wendy and I were just talking over the weekend about a person we have observed who seemingly chooses to be shackled to their legalistic, religious rules. Our discussion led to  that people who choose to be enslaved to legalistic, religious rules are motivated out of a fear of what others will think. It would seem that they are so worried about appearing good, pure, upstanding, holy that they will tie themselves up in knots to keep up the appearance of propriety (and will try to force their loved ones to do the same). The result? Uptight, joyless people enslaved to rules and perceptions.

This is exactly what Paul was touching on in today’s chapter. Experiencing the spiritual freedom to follow Jesus’ teaching without jumping through the legalistic hoops of Judaism, Paul now had to confront the uptight, joyless legalists who wished to put, and all other believers, him back in shackles. “No thanks,” I hear Paul saying and my own soul echoes the sentiment. I walked the path of legalism for several years and it twisted my soul to the point that love, joy, and peace were wrung out of my life – the very things that matter most.

To the legalistic, religious, rule following Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

The discussion Wendy and I had led us to feel sorry for our shackled friend. “We need to pray for them to experience real freedom,” Wendy said. Indeed. And, so we are.

The Many Faces of Prejudice

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 “Surely such is the dwelling of an evil man;
   such is the place of one who does not know God.”
Job 18:21 (NIV)

As I write these words, our nation finds itself struggling with racial tension after a young black man was shot by a white police officer in Ferguson, Missouri and the legal system found no legal basis to charge the officer with wrong doing. I have seen this before. I watched it happen after the Rodney King verdict in California. As a child I remember the conversation which lingered for years after the race riots in Watts, California. As a teenager I attended what was, at the time, the most racially diverse high school in the state of Iowa, and I sat on a student committee with students from the white, black, hispanic and asian communities. Our nation is a melting pot, and we continually struggle to get past preconceived notions of one another, to connect, and to relate to one another on a human level.

Along the journey I’ve discovered that prejudice comes in many different forms. Race does not have a monopoly on pre-judging others. There is socio- economic prejudice as in “All rich people are…” or “All those white trash are….” There is regional prejudice as we speak of east coast liberals, northern yankees, southern hillbillies, west coast granola types, midwest farmers, and etc.” There is increasing political prejudice on both sides of the aisle. And, there is also spiritual prejudice which we see in today’s chapter.

Bildad’s rhetoric is getting more intense as he begins to lose patience with Job. He sets off on what he perceives to be the common end of all who are “wicked” and it looks a lot like Job’s present circumstances. The problem is, Bildad is painting his picture of the wicked with a very broad brush. For every wicked person who gets what we believe to be just suffering for their wrong doing, there is another wicked person who gets away with it. For every righteous person who seems to wallow in abundant blessing, I can show you a righteous person who endures unbelievable suffering like Job.

Today, I am reminded that Jesus repeatedly commanded us NOT to judge others, even as He commanded us to LOVE even our enemies and those who hate and persecute us. Until each one of us obediently follows both commands we will continue to struggle with all of our prejudices.

Finding Wisdom Amidst the Ruins

Chorazin

“Woe to you, Chorazin! Woe to you, Bethsaida! For if the miracles that were performed in you had been performed in Tyre and Sidon, they would have repented long ago, sitting in sackcloth and ashes. But it will be more bearable for Tyre and Sidon at the judgment than for you. And you, Capernaum, will you be lifted to the heavens? No, you will go down to Hades.” Luke 10:13-15 (NIV)

When you visit Israel, there are a million places you can visit. Jerusalem and the temple mount are a big attraction. Floating in the Dead Sea and trekking up to the fortress of Masada makes the top of most tourist’s list as does a dinner cruise on the Sea of Galilee. Then there is Megiddo, Mount Carmel, Mount Gilboa, the Garden Tomb, the Church of the Holy Sepulcher, The Jordan River, and on and on and on.

As I and my companions made our way around the north shore of the of Sea of Galilee, our guide, George, took a turn onto some back roads. It was obvious that we were off the beaten path. Even George, who knows the area like the back of his hand, seemed a bit lost for a few minutes. Finally we pulled into a group of ruins and got out. The site was desolate and bare. Unlike many sites in the Holy Land there was no hoopla. There were no trinket shops or refreshment stands. This place was clearly among the official sites to get scratched off the “must see” list for most tourists. The place was dead.

We were in the ruins of Chorazin, a small backwater town where Jesus once taught and performed miracles. The people of Chorazin did not respond favorably to Jesus message and miracles, however. I pondered Jesus’ words of woe as I walked silently among the ruined walls and abandoned buildings.

Wendy and I have been talking a lot this past week about the small daily choices we make and their cumulative effects. “I place before you Life and Death,” God once told His people before adding, “Choose life.” Along this journey I’ve come to realize that the choice of Life or Death is not a one time monumental decision, but a series of small daily choices that I make every day. What I choose to eat and how much of it I consume slowly affects my weight, my mood, and a myriad of other health issues. If I choose to sleep in and forget an important meeting it will affect my client relationship and, eventually, my income. If I consistently choose to give in to little bad habits they will eventually lead to very big consequences.

I snapped the picture above from the rubble of Chorazin looking out over the Sea of Galilee. It’s become a constant reminder to me that Jesus is both Savior and Judge. I find that I love to think of Jesus the Savior, but I like to conveniently forget Jesus the Judge. Woe to me for doing so, for amidst a judged Chorazin there is wisdom to be found for those who choose to wander in the ruins and digest Jesus’ words.

Responding to Speculation and False Accusations

Tabloids a Twitter
Tabloids a Twitter (Photo credit: noodlepie)

Let them know that it is your hand,
    that you, Lord, have done it.
While they curse, may you bless;
    may those who attack me be put to shame,
    but may your servant rejoice.
Psalm 109:27-28 (NIV)

Those who live life as public figures or in the spotlight of leadership are likely to find ourselves in the midst of a whirlwind of speculation and suspicion at some point in our lives. People are people, and whether you lived some 30 centuries ago in Jerusalem or live in rural Iowa today you will find that some experiences are common to humanity. There is a particular kind of insanity producing frustration that comes with finding yourself at the center of others’ misguided gossip and false accusations.

King David, who penned the lyrics of today’s psalm, was no stranger to the spotlight of popularity and leadership, nor was he a stranger to scandal and public ridicule. For certain, some of the public ridicule David brought on himself. Like all of us, David made his share of boneheaded mistakes. Yet, even in the tornado of gossip the truth often becomes distorted and inflated into crazy tabloid speculation.

In my experience, there are only a few things you can do when you find yourself the subject of local gossip and speculation:

  1. Plead your case in the right place. Vent your frustration to God. That’s what today’s psalm was all about for David. Psalm 109 is an ancient example of a screaming, venting, thrashing Metalcore anthem. Get it out. Express your feelings. Tell God what you’d really like to see happen to those lying gossips talking about you behind your back. It’s okay. God understands your emotion and isn’t surprised by your feelings of vengeance. It’ll be good for you.
  2. Let it go. Once you’ve vented your anger and frustration, take a deep breath and then let it go. Believe me, there is nothing you can do to chase down and confront every source of gossip and every false accusation that you hear on the streets and behind your back. You’ll ultimately fail, drive yourself crazy in the process, and your efforts will only fan the flames of speculation. Like David, don’t just plead your case to God but also relinquish your desire for justice to the only True Judge.
  3. Stay the course. When Wendy and I were married (Eight years ago this New Year’s Eve!), it created a fair amount of talk in our neck of the woods. I was recently divorced at the time and I admit that the timing of our quick courtship did not do anything to quell the rumors and idle gossip. We heard the whispers and felt the self-righteous judgment and disapproval of others. At that point in time, Wendy’s mom gave us a sage piece of advice: Make like a turtle. Toughen up the shell, let it bounce off, and keep plodding towards what you know is right. Slow and steady wins the race.
  4. Give it time. Just this past week I was told that a young adult, who has watched Wendy’s and my marriage for the past eight years, commented that they see our relationship as an example of the kind of marriage they want for themselves. Wendy and I talked about that last night and marveled at how far we’ve come from those days when it was whispered that ours was a flash-in-the-pan rebound relationship doomed to failure. If you find yourself falsely accused, remember that what is true about you will be revealed in the test of time as others observe your faith, love, life, actions, words, and relationships.