Tag Archives: Anger

Chapter-a-Day

Grace, Served Neat

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https://open.spotify.com/episode/5aBZqkOrQyO7tWxM4iKuyg?si=6sAzxbRqQVGI-7CQjo977g

What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?
James 4:1 (NIV)

After yesterday’s post, I spent some time yesterday in introspection. Wendy and I met downstairs in the Vander Well Pub for a happy hour chat. We bellied-up to the bar and discussed some of the things that came out of my prayer and reflection. It was good.

Today’s chapter continues the flow from yesterday. There, streaming beneath the surface text, is the notion of God as intimate partner in relationship. It’s the same heart that God weaves through the entire Great Story. It’s a love story in the deepest sense; God as bridegroom initiating, courting, and pursuing intimate relationship with me.

So, what gets in the way of that intimacy?

I do.

James urges me to continue my honest introspection. What is it I desire? What motives are at work? As I did some spiritual cardio evaluation yesterday, I had to come clean with the fact that I sometimes allow my self-righteous desires and pride free rein when it comes to my attitudes towards certain individuals. Wendy gave me a great example during happy hour last night, that I hadn’t even considered. A person that she has noticed I love to hate. She didn’t need to make a case. The truth was sitting there in plain site. Ugh!

What did James point out earlier? A little bit of sin taints the whole loaf. My well-cloaked hatred toward one individual makes me no different, in essence, from someone spewing anonymous venom across the internet. It’s the same heart condition.

Pride, hatred, judgment, self-righteousness. That’s the way the world operates. It flies in the face of the person I want to be. It’s not the person Jesus asks me to be. And, that has relational consequences.

I can wallow in guilt and shame, but that’s not healthy for me either. It doesn’t accomplish anything but a perpetuation of spiritual dysfunction. I want to be better. I want to move the ball forward. I want positive change that will create more intimacy with God and others.

Here’s where it gets good.

James reminds me that God is not standing at a distance in condemnation of me. He “jealously longs” for me in spirit. He is leaning in towards me with more grace.

“Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.”

The reality is that Wendy was Jesus at happy hour last night—even as she held up a mirror so I could reflect on what I didn’t really want to see.

She didn’t scoot her bar stool further away from me.
There was no relational stiff-arming.

She leaned in.
She drew close.
She was tender and gracious.

That’s what Jesus does.

He invites me to come a little closer so He can whisper into my soul. The wars in my life—external and internal—are not solved by winning. They’re healed by yielding.

Then Jesus, through James, reminds me in today’s chapter to:

  • Name my desires honestly (even the embarrassing ones).
  • Release the illusion of control (that tight grip is killing the mood anyway).
  • Kneel without theatrics—no performance, just presence.
  • Return to God not as a failure, but as a lover who wandered and came home.

Humility is not humiliation.
It is intimacy without pretense.

And grace?
Grace is Jesus lifting my chin, meeting my eyes, and smiling and saying…

“I love you. Come on — let’s move forward.”

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

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These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!
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Chapter-a-Day

Diagnosis I Didn’t Ask For

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With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be.
James 3:9-10 (NIV)

Wendy and I were on our way to worship this past Sunday morning. We were having a conversation about an individual who had made some major mistakes in leadership which led to many painful and widespread consequences.

“They were worthless at the job,” I said as I drove.

“Let’s say they were ‘incapable’ at the job,” Wendy said softly but directly. “No one is ‘worthless.’”

She was so, so correct.

“I’m trying to be more careful about the words I use when speaking of others,” she then added.

I immediately apologized and accepted my error. I need to be more careful with my words.

This episode in the car with Wendy happened amidst the final editing process of my upcoming book. In the process of editing my original manuscript, my editor pointed out a similarly painful observation. She noticed that I at times used harsh language when I wrote about certain individuals I had encountered along my career. She felt it was important enough that she point it out to me.

“I know your heart, Tom,” she said to me. “And, this is not the person you want to be. I knew you’d want me to be honest about what I’m seeing.”

Ugh. I have a blind spot.

Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner.

Some mornings as I read and meditate on the chapter I have to dig deep to mine what God has for me in the text. Other mornings, it simply jumps off the page and slaps me across the face.

That was this morning.

Most of today’s chapter James focuses on the power of the tongue. It’s such a small part of our physical whole yet it has disproportionate affect. James likens it to the rudder of a ship as it can steer me in the wrong direction. He likens it to a spark that can unleash a wildfire of conflict and controversy I didn’t intend.

As I meditated on it this morning I likened it to a living cardiogram — my words revealing symptoms of heart trouble. Harsh, rash words about others are indicators that bitterness, anger, and contempt have been building up inside like plaque in my spiritual arteries.

And so, I find myself sitting here in the quiet knowing there are some things I need to do.

First, I need to take some time for introspection. I need to ask God to help me take an honest look inside at where some ugly thoughts and feelings about others have been building up inside me.

Next comes confession. As I discover where that build-up of bitterness is hiding and with whom I’m harboring ill-will, I need to use my tongue to honestly speak it out loud to God and members of my inner-circle with whom I know I am safe and am surrounded by love and grace.

Finally, I need to be accountable. A diabetic constantly monitors their blood-sugar to watch for signs of a problem. I need to better monitor my words, especially when I’m speaking about others. Once again, my inner-circle are my best source for that assistance.

I have discovered a problem.
I have been given a prescription.
Now — by grace — I must take the medicine.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

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These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!
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Chapter-a-Day

A Step Toward Refuge

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If the Lord your God enlarges your territory, as he promised on oath to your ancestors, and gives you the whole land he promised them, because you carefully follow all these laws I command you today—to love the Lord your God and to walk always in obedience to him—then you are to set aside three more cities.
Deuteronomy 19:8-9 (NIV)

As Wendy and I sit in the morning and peruse the news of the day I’ve observed a distinct difference between us. Wendy regularly wades into the comments that readers make to the article or editorial she’s just read. She finds it interesting to gauge response to the topic or opinion. Wendy is an Enneagram Type Eight. For Eights, conflict is a form of intimacy.

I, on the other hand, rarely look at the comments. As an Enneagram Type Four, contention can quickly lead me to despair. When I read comments I find so many thoughtless words, hasty judgments, and seeds of anonymous hate spewed on the digital page. It leaves me desiring my morning shower.

I had the honor of delivering the message yesterday among our local gathering of Jesus’ followers. We’re launching a year-long theme that, looking back at my spiritual journey, I find doesn’t get much play these days.

Refuge. Specifically, Refuge Over Rejection.

Where do I run when I need mercy, grace, and a shelter from the storm?

I find it fascinating that thousands of years ago God made refuge a cornerstone of the community He designed and called for to be implemented among His people. In a moment of synchronicity, “refuge” appears once again in this morning’s chapter.

God through Moses reminds His children, just preparing to cross into the Promised Land, that they are to quickly establish three cities of refuge—spread equidistant across the geography. These cities must be accessible to everyone. They must be clearly marked. The roads leading to them must be clear and easily trodden.

God paves the way to grace.

Mercy has an address.

The chapter goes on to mention that accusations must be corroborated by two or three witnesses. These are not exclusionary sections of the chapter. There is a thread of thought God is weaving through His refuge design. As I meditated on the chapter I came to realize that this divine justice system allows for time.

Rage does not get the final word.
Truth must be corroborated.
Witnesses must agree.
The community must slow down before rendering judgment.

As I pondered this, my mind quickly returned to our digital age and all those comments. Instant news, trending topics, and billions of people with laptops, tablets, and smart phones. We can broadcast our momentary rage, venomous thought, hasty judgment, vengeance, and condemnation to the entire world 24/7/365. And it can all be done behind the anonymity of a username.

As I meditated on the stark contrast between God’s ancient design and our modern Twitter-esque technology, I found both wisdom and solace in the former. The latter strikes me as a modern day Tower of Babel constructed of server farms and cell towers – ending in confusion, chaos, division, and babbling voices that offer no peace, no mercy, no grace, no refuge.

Finally, my thoughts landed on the fact that God calls for three cities of refuge to be established, though the total number in God’s ultimate Promised Land blueprint was six. In other words, God is calling for phased mercy. He doesn’t want His people to wait until the land is completely settled. He wants them to quickly take the first step toward refuge.

Yesterday, as our worship concluded there was an unexpected outpouring among our local gathering. It appeared that everyone in the room was ready to take a step toward refuge. Perhaps I’m not the only one weary of our modern world and culture of Babel.

As our local gathering sets off on our year-long road to refuge. As I set off on this another work week at the beginning of a new year, my soul is mulling over the answers to a few questions surfaced in the quiet:

Is the road to mercy in my life clear—or cluttered?
Do people know how to reach grace through me, or do they hit barricades of judgment and suspicion?

Do my words shelter truth—or endanger it?
False witness isn’t just perjury. It’s gossip. Spin. Tweets. Convenient silence.

Do people find refuge in my presence?
Am I a safe place where people know they will be seen, heard, and loved?

I serve a God of refuge. This morning’s chapter reminds me that from ancient days, God has made being a refuge a priority for His people. I endeavor today, this week, this year, to take steps towards that calling.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

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These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!
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Chapter-a-Day

“Bring Mark”

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Only Luke is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, because he is helpful to me in my ministry. 
2 Timothy 4:11 (NIV)

Paul sits alone in the Roman dungeon. Despite his words of encouragement to Timothy, despite the hope of an eternal reward that awaits him, there is no mistaking the heaviness of heart he feels as he awaits his appointment with the executioner that he knows is imminent. Paul’s final words of this the final letter are filled with loneliness…

Demas has deserted me.
Crescens left me too.
So did Titus.
Only Luke is with me.
Please come quickly.

Then Paul makes an unusual request.

Get Mark and bring him with you. I need his help.

The personal greetings in the letters of the New Testament don’t get much attention from casual readers. The names are strange, there’s no real context, and the message doesn’t have any real meaning for the reader. But those personal greetings often point to stories that are full of meaning and Paul’s request for Mark to come to him is one.

Mark was known as John Mark. He was a young man when he and his mother became followers of Jesus. Mark was present in the garden when Jesus was arrested. His mother’s house became a hideout for the disciples and Jesus’ followers during and after the crucifixion. When Paul set off on his first missionary journey to take Jesus’ message to the Gentiles in Greece and Asia Minor, young Mark was part of the entourage.

Wherever Paul went, he stirred the pot. When Paul stirred the pot things got hard. Persecution, riots, getting arrested, getting beaten, death threats, and getting stoned were what came with the territory.

Mark couldn’t handle it. He bailed on Paul and Barnabas and went home.

A few years later, Paul approached Barnabas about taking a road trip to visit all the local gatherings they’d planted on that earlier journey. Barnabas wanted to bring Mark with them. Paul wanted nothing to do with having Mark along after he wimped out on them before. Things got heated. Words were exchanged. Paul and Barnabas parted ways. Barnabas took Mark with him. Paul went in the opposite direction.

Fast forward to Paul in the final days of his earthly journey sitting alone in darkness and chains. Among the final words of this his final letter he writes:

Get Mark and bring him with you. I need his help.

We don’t know the whole story, but it is obvious that there was a reconciliation between Mark and Paul. Mark regained Paul’s trust. Paul forgave Mark for deserting him on that first journey. Their relationship was not only restored but grew. Mark became indispensable to Paul in his later years, his imprisonments, and his tireless work of spreading Jesus’ message.

As I look back at my life journey, there have been conflicts with people I love very much. I have my own moments of disagreement when things got heated, words got exchanged, and when I and my friend walked away in opposite directions. Life gets messy. I hear Jesus’ words echo in my soul as I type this in the quiet:

“This is how I want you to conduct yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and, about to make an offering, you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make things right. Then and only then, come back and work things out with God. Or say you’re out on the street and an old enemy accosts you. Don’t lose a minute. Make the first move; make things right with him. “
Matthew 5:23-25 (MSG)

I wish I could say that every broken relationship gets reconciled this side of heaven. That has not been my experience, but some do and as a disciple of Jesus my job is to do my part in creating the atmosphere in which reconciliation might happen. I can’t control the other person, but I do control myself. I can forgive. I can be gracious. I can reach out. I can make the first move.

Paul’s desire to have Mark by his side at the end of his earthly journey is a reminder to never give up trying to make things right in relationship.

Note: I’m out on a business trip the next two days. Will plan to be back on the chapter-a-day trek on Friday.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

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These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!

Chapter-a-Day

Oaths and Pipe-Dreams

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“When a man makes a vow to the Lord or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.”
Numbers 30:2 (NIV)

I sat in a meeting. It was a big team and there was a definite buzz in the room. As the meeting began the team leader began to speak about his vision for the team and our task. That’s when it got weird. The team leader’s stated vision wasn’t just a BHAG (big, hairy, audacious, goal), it was more of a pipe-dream on steroids. And it wasn’t delivered as something to reach for as a team but more of a divinely authoritative statement about what was definitely going to happen. It was a form of oath of what the team leader was going to do, what the outcome would be, and our participation in his Powerball prognostication.

It was rash. It was silly. It was foolish. It didn’t take long for the team to implode. The team leader’s pipe-dream remained just that.

I commonly hear people use the phrase, “I swear to God.” It’s casually thrown out in our culture, but the concept of a divine oath is as old as humanity itself and throughout history oaths have carried very serious cultural and societal weight in ways we can’t imagine today. To make an oath was spiritually binding and carried with it the threat of divine retribution. In medieval times, a noble made an oath on the bones of St. Cuthbert and then broke his oath. Writers took great pleasure in sharing the terrible things that befell the noble as a result. In ancient Assyria, a treaty between parties was ritually sealed with the saying “May your seed be like this sheep’s entrails if you betray this oath.” And yes, a sheep was slaughtered as part of the ritual for visual impact of the seriousness of keeping one’s word.

Throughout history, if you said, “I swear to God” it would have been taken as a very serious statement for which you would be culturally held accountable by society. If you broke that oath, there would be the expectation that God would curse you and perhaps the community would take care of punishing you themselves in order to avoid the divine retribution having a ripple effect on them.

In today’s chapter, God reminds the Hebrew people through Moses that oaths were serious and binding. However, God also goes on to create a system of annulment for rash words and oaths. A modern reader might have difficulty getting past the ancient historical context of the annulment’s gender power dynamics, but for the Hebrews in Moses’ day God’s addendum to the law as a radical act of mercy for families and households. It provided a gracious “out” for rash words spoken in anger or foolish pipe dreams spoken out of hubris.

This seriousness about oaths and the ancient cultural preoccupation with the system by which oaths were made, kept, policed, and punished was Jesus’ motivation for saying,

“Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not break your oath,but fulfill to the Lord the vows you have made.’ But I tell you, do not swear an oath at all:either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make even one hair white or black. All you need to say is simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’;anything beyond this comes from the evil one.”

In the quiet this morning, I find my mind wandering back into that room with the team and our team leader’s Powerball prognostication of pipe-dream glory. I learned an important lesson about leadership that day. There is a difference between an achievable stretch goal and a pipe-dream. There’s a difference between a BHAG and wishful thinking. As a leader, I want to provide an inspiring vision that motivates a team to rise to the occasion. Providing a flight of fantasy, like a rashly made oath, is only setting myself and the team up for a tragic fall.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

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Chapter-a-Day

God’s Response

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The Lord said to Moses, “Speak to the Israelites and say to them: ‘After you enter the land I am giving you as a home…”
Numbers 15:1-2a (NIV)

As I look back over the past three-to-five years, I realize that I have experienced more reactionary, emotional outbursts from other human beings than perhaps in the rest of my half-century of cognitive memory on this earthly journey. I have been yelled at, angrily accused of things, told off, and been given angry lists of demands and expectations of others. I tend to think that a cocktail of brain-altering technology, a global pandemic, and political polarization have all contributed to the acute increase in these experiences.

As this happens, I have found myself relying on a lifetime of spiritual discipline in order to try to respond to these moments appropriately. In kind reactions tend to only escalate situations and perpetuate the problem. As a disciple of Jesus, I desire to respond with the fruit of God’s Spirit as I am called to do. That means responding with a demonstration of peace, patience, kindness, and gentleness.

There is something telling about the way individuals respond to their circumstances in light of the words, actions, and/or behavior of others. Is there reactive rage of defensiveness? Cries of vengeance? Or, is there a gracious response?

In yesterday’s chapter, God’s people rejected His promise and command to enter the Promised Land. They turned against Moses and Aaron. They attempted to go it on their own without God.

Today’s chapter begins with God giving Moses instructions for how things are to be established when His people enter the Promised Land. It will be in another 40 years. It will be the next generation, but God provides instructions. For an old man like Moses, this likely felt ridiculous. It’s a long ways away. For God, who exists outside of time, and with whom “a thousand years is like a day,” forty-years nothing. And, there is a message in the madness of these instructions being given on the heels of the Hebrews’ rebellion:

“I will fulfill my covenant, and my promise to Abraham.”
“I will fulfill my promise to my people.”
“Their doubt and decision is a delay, my decision and promise remain.”

It’s a messy thing about the free will with which God gifted His human creation. We don’t control others. Others may use their free will to do all sorts of destructive things. The only thing I control is whether I react in kind and escalate the descent to chaos, or whether I willfully respond the way Jesus taught me, by returning curses with blessings, turning the other cheek, and loving my enemies.

In today’s chapter, God’s faithful and forward looking response to His own people’s faithless and backwards looking decisions provides me an example to remember the next time I find myself under emotionally reactive attack.

Sadly, I have a feeling I’m not done experiencing these kinds of situations for the foreseeable future.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

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Chapter-a-Day

Wallflower

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Wallflower (CaD Matt 7) – Wayfarer

“For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”
Matthew 7:8 (NIV)

The further I get on this life journey, the more things I discover about myself. When I was a young man, I thought I knew myself well, but the reality is that I didn’t know my true self at all. What I realized along the way is that self-discovery required the hero’s journey. It is only through wilderness wanderings, crisis, and trial that I discovered the means by which I uncovered things buried deep within.

It is only later in life that I have learned to recognize one of my patterns of behavior. The truth is that I am, at the heart of things, a wallflower. I don’t like to initiate things, rather I like to be invited in to things. I tend not to insert myself or take the first step. I don’t want to go chasing after things, I like to wait for things to naturally flow to me.

I have learned and experienced that this particular trait, like most quirks of personality and temperament, comes with both positive and negative consequences.

Today’s chapter is the final of three chapters that make up Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount. As He approaches the end of His message, Jesus famously tells His audience to take the initiative to spiritually ask, seek, and knock. As I read this in the quiet this morning, my soul felt familiar pangs of internal discomfort. Asking, seeking, and knocking on opportunity’s door all require initiative. They all come with the risk of failure, disappointment, and rejection. That’s where my struggle is rooted.

I have learned from my study of the Enneagram that across the nine types there is a triad of core struggles: fear, anger, and shame. As an Enneagram Type Four, shame is my core struggle. It is the deep sense that there is something flawed in me, that I am not enough, and I am worthless.

If I step out and take the initiative to ask, there’s a chance that the answer will be “no, not for you” and it will only reinforce my shame. Nope. I think I’ll just stand here and wait for someone to come along, notice me, and offer me what I desire.

If I seek and take the initiative to find, I could easily find myself back in the wilderness again, feeling lost and void of the things I need to find my way. Nope. I think I’ll just stand here at the edge of opportunity until someone offers to safely guide me.

If I knock, I don’t know who will open the door. I don’t know how they will respond to my interruption. Maybe they’re having dinner, or indisposed, or hate being interrupted. There’s a chance they’ll slam the door in my face. Nope. That would only reinforce my shame. It’s easier just not taking the risk. I’ll just stand here outside the door and wait for the door to open on its own.

Ugh. Even writing this honest assessment of my inner thoughts stirs my sense of shame.

In the quiet this morning, I find myself reminded of the older brother in Jesus’ story of the Prodigal Son. He was angry that His father threw a big homecoming party for his wayward, disobedient little brother. He complains that not once had his father thrown a dinner party for him and his friends. The father replies, “But, son, you never asked.”

I’m still learning. Overcoming my core struggle with shame requires me to exercise faith despite my fear. This wallflower has to have the faith to step out onto the dance floor, approach that girl with the wild head of curly, mahogany hair and mischievous look in her blue eyes and ask her to dance. Yes, she might say no. On the other hand, I might find out her name is Wendy and taking the initiative to ask her for a dance might launch the greatest and most profitable adventure of my life journey.

I’m still learning.

Lord, in the quiet this morning, I ask that you continue to teach me, I seek your grace for being a slow learner. Heavenly Father, I’m knocking on your door this morning and wondering if I might possibly have your blessing this day. Thanks.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!
Chapter-a-Day

Others

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Others (CaD Lev 19) – Wayfarer

“‘Do not pervert justice; do not show partiality to the poor or favoritism to the great, but judge your neighbor fairly.’”
Leviticus 19:15 (NIV)

I’m sure that I’m not the only one who has noticed that the level of vitriol between both individuals and tribes of individuals has risen dramatically in the last 10 years. The political divide has a lot to do with this. In my observation, the mainstream media and cable news (on both sides) have helped spur the increased animosity. All I have to do is take about 30 seconds to scroll through the feed of X or BlueSky and my mind and soul will be coated with the residue of anger, rage, and savage written attacks against the “other” of whoever is spewing their personal prejudice and hatred.

So far in this chapter-a-day journey through the ancient Hebrew priestly manual known as Leviticus, God has prescribed offerings and ritual sacrifices for the Hebrews. He has appointed priests, given them instructions for their job, and instituted the sacrificial system. God then explained what made people ritually “clean” or “unclean,” and prescribed an annual Day of Atonement in which the High Priest made one sacrifice for the sin of all the people, and foreshadowed the ultimate sacrifice that Jesus would make on the cross. The final section of Leviticus (chapters 17-26) are instructions God gives to His people for “holy” living. Today’s chapter is like a potpourri of individual prescriptions, each one of them standing on their own.

As I read through the instructions in today’s chapter, there were some that make little or no sense in today’s world and even scholars will agree that the purpose and meaning has been lost over time, like not wearing clothing made woven of two kinds of material. There are cultural taboos that had to do with being “different” from the tribes around them and the connotations that came with them at that period of time, like having tattoos (fyi: Wendy just got her latest tattoo yesterday. It’s gorgeous). But most of the prescribed instructions in today’s chapter have to do with treating others, all others with respect, honesty, courtesy, and love. It is from today’s chapter that Jesus quotes the second of the two commands that He said sum up all of the Law and the Prophets: “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” (vs. 18)

Parents, employees, children, the disabled, immigrants, the elderly, customers, neighbors, slaves, rich, poor, and the tribe as a whole are called out as those one is to deferentially treat with love, generosity, honor, and dignity. I personally found it fascinating that one of the prescriptions instructed the Hebrews to not show partiality to either the great or the poor, but to treat each fairly and objectively. I found it particularly poignant as I see one side of the political spectrum demonizing the rich with a broad brush as greedy, heartless, law breaking charlatans. The other side, meanwhile, demonizes the poor with a broad brush as lazy, freeloading, drug addicted, and worthless drains on society.

In the quiet this morning as I pondered these prescriptions for treating others, I thought about a conversation Wendy and I had on vacation a few weeks ago. We were in New Orleans for the week before the Super Bowl (unintentional timing) and then spent a week on a cruise. We were surrounded by crowds and we interacted with a diverse swath of humanity both weeks and in our travel to and from New Orleans. What we witnessed was people treating one another with kindness and respect. We met people from all walks of life. We interacted with different races, ethnicities, geographic backgrounds, education levels, and socio-economic status. With it being Super Bowl week, believe me that the uber rich were there right along with NOLA’s regular homeless residents. We were encouraged by our experiences with everyone.

Which leads me to think that perhaps the best thing I can do for my mind and soul is to stay away from the mainstream media and just ignore the feeds on X and Bluesky. If I focus on doing as God prescribes with the people I interact with today in my circles of influence I will have a greater affect on this world than if I spend my day screaming my political opinions to the internet.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!
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Best of ’24: #2 Responding and Reacting

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For two weeks, while Wendy and I are away enjoying some warm weather, I’ll be counting down the top ten chapter-a-day posts of 2024 (based on total views and plays). It’ s always interesting which posts resonated with readers and listeners. The chapter for tomorrow’s post will be listed at the bottom.

Responding and Reacting (CaD Rom 12) – Wayfarer

Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
Romans 12:19-21 (NIV)

This past weekend, the world was stunned when the opening ceremony of the Olympics featured what appeared to be a parody of Da Vinci’s The Last Supper using drag queens and a large lady with a plunging neckline in place of Jesus. There have been all sorts of reactions to the scene, but it came to mind this morning as I read today’s chapter.

I will admit that my initial reaction was one of shock then offended anger. I scrolled my feed on X to see how people were responding. I ran across one tweet from a young Muslim woman. “As a Muslim, even I am offended by this. Where are you Christians? Why are you so weak?”

As a disciple of Jesus, however, I don’t want to be a slave to my emotional reactions but rather respond in the Spirit. So rather than spew my rage to the masses, I took some time to ponder the French parody and how Jesus would respond. Here are the conclusions I came to.

Jesus would not be surprised at all by it. In fact, He told me that this is exactly the thing I should expect from the world. Here are a couple of key statements:

“Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me.”
Matthew 24:9

“Everyone will hate you because of me.”
Luke 21:17

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you.”
John 15:18-19

…in fact, the time is coming when anyone who kills you will think they are offering a service to God.
John 16:2b

“But this is to fulfill what is written in their Law: ‘They hated me without reason.’”
John 15:25

Jesus asks me to respond differently than the world reacts. Anger, rage, and retribution are the ways of the world. To me, this silly mockery is a metaphorical slap in the face, and a classic opportunity to respond in the very way Jesus taught me.

God does not need me to be His avenger. A few years ago, the offices of Charlie Hebdo in France were attacked and the workers were massacred by Muslim terrorists. They did this because the French satire magazine parodied Mohammed in a comic. I wondered, “Is this what the Muslim young lady thinks Christians should do so as not to be ‘weak?'” Jesus made it very clear that God can handle vengeance on His own without my help, and that my job is to love, bless, and pray for those who mock, hate, and persecute.

The very heart of Jesus’ example and teaching is that real spiritual strength is found in what the world perceives as weakness. Jesus willingly surrendered Himself to be crucified and said that I should take up my own cross and follow His example. Resurrection power does not come from marching in the streets, taking up arms, political leverage, or trending social media outrage. Resurrection power only comes through death. Sometimes that means I have to die to my desire or need for a sense of justice, or revenge, or self-righteous satisfaction.

In the quiet this morning, I’m thinking about an article I read yesterday in the Free Press in which the author commented that the people who should really be angry are not the Christians, but the citizens of France who had a chance to show the world the best they’ve got to offer with regards to art and culture and have to ask themselves “Is this is the best we could come up with?” In the meantime, I’m not too worked up about it. I have people to love, clients to serve, and a bunch of meetings today in which I hope to be an example of Jesus’ loving kindness and self-control.

Tomorrow’s Chapter: John 6

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!

Chapter-a-Day

Best of ’24: #5 A Confession

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For two weeks, while Wendy and I are away enjoying some warm weather, I’ll be counting down the top ten chapter-a-day posts of 2024 (based on total views and plays). It’ s always interesting which posts resonated with readers and listeners. The chapter for tomorrow’s post will be listed at the bottom.

A Confession (CaD Rom 9) – Wayfarer

Therefore God has mercy on whom he wants to have mercy, and he hardens whom he wants to harden.
Romans 9:18 (NIV)

A decade or so ago, I found myself in the check-out line in a department store feeling this quiet, internal, seething anger. The source of this anger? Chip and Joanna Gaines. They were everywhere. Wendy and every one of her friends were talking about them. People I know were making pilgrimages to Waco, Texas. Their “collections” were suddenly in every store. There in the checkout line, Joanna was staring at me from the covert of Cosmopolitan. So, what do we do when we get angry these days? We vent on social media!

“I love Chip and Joanna,” I tweeted, “but I’m tired of seeing their faces a million times a day!”

The next day my tweet received a reply from Chip Gaines, himself.

“I know,” he tweeted back, “I told Joanna the other day that even I’m tired of us!”

It wasn’t long after this that I noticed myself feeling that same quiet, internal, seething anger. This time it was an online author and “influencer” who was trending and I started hearing this person’s name come up in conversation all the time. I remember Wendy and her friends talking in our kitchen one day and everyone was talking about what this influencer recently said about this or that topic. I was suddenly filled with anger. I wanted to throw up. I had to leave the room my insides were seething so intensely.

The problem was, I knew that these angry reactions inside of me weren’t healthy. Anger like this always points to something deeper in the Spirit that is askew. I began to dig into what it was that was going on inside of my heart. The answer ended up being simple once I realized it. Suddenly, it dawned on me that I’ve had this anger, these feelings of irritation and animosity, toward certain individuals my entire life. And they were almost all individuals I didn’t know at all!

Here I was a 50-year-old man who had been a disciple of Jesus for almost 40 years and it had taken me that long to realize that I have a problem with envy. The commonality between all of the individuals who produced this latent animosity within me is that they were people who suddenly became famous and everyone was talking about them and being influenced by them. Why them? Why not me? I feel shame in confessing it because it feels so petty. It’s true, however. I have to own it. Over the past several years I’ve had to consciously deal with this very real sin to which I had been blind my entire life.

As I have processed and worked on my envy, I have run headlong into what, in human terms, is an uncomfortable reality: God’s sovereignty.

Jesus told a parable about the owner of a vineyard. Throughout the day the owner finds workers, negotiates a price for their labor for the day, and sends them to work in his vineyard. At the end of the day, the workers who worked all day find out that they’re getting paid the same as the guy who was hired for the final two hours of the day. They are pissed. The owner of the vineyard responds,

‘Friend, I haven’t been unfair. We agreed on the wage of a dollar, didn’t we? So take it and go. I decided to give to the one who came last the same as you. Can’t I do what I want with my own money? Are you going to get stingy because I am generous?’
Matthew 20:13-15 (MSG)

In today’s chapter, Paul addresses the truth of God’s sovereignty. God blessed Jacob, but not his older twin brother Esau. The prodigal wastes all of his father’s money on partying and prostitutes and is given a homecoming party, while the older brother goes seemingly uncelebrated for his faithfulness and obedience. God, in His sovereign purposes, raises one person to prominence while another works in obscurity.

On one hand, I can dismiss these human inequities as simply “life isn’t fair” (and it’s not), but Paul is adding to this another layer of truth that Jesus was addressing in His parable. God is sovereign, and His knowledge and purposes are infinite, while mine are finite. This is where a disciple of Jesus finds the requirement of faith and surrender.

If God is good, and I believe He is. If God has a good purpose for me and my life, and I believe He does. Then I can rest in living the life God has generously and sovereignly purposed for me, this life I am now living, and this path I am now walking. I can also surrender any desire that my path should be like the one anyone else is walking.

In the quiet this morning, I’m thinking about our kitchen. On the counter, right next to the stove, Wendy has placed the Magnolia Cook Book in such a way that Joanna Gaines stares at me every day in my own house. It’s good. It no longer triggers me. It’s a daily reminder for me to pray for Chip and Joanna and all that God is doing in and through their lives. God has been generous to them, and they have a tremendous amount of positive impact in our world. I’m also quite certain that they face struggles and stresses because of that generosity which I wouldn’t want in a million years. In dealing with my envy problem, I’ve embraced that sometimes God’s generosity is in saving us from the things our heart’s desire, but which would lead to tragedies we could never foresee.

Tomorrow’s Chapter: Acts 19

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!