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Chapter-a-Day

An Ambitiously Quiet Life

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An Ambitiously Quiet Life (CaD 1 Thess 4) – Wayfarer

…make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.
1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 (NIV)

This past winter and spring our kids and grandkids lived with us for over four months here in Pella, Iowa (see featured photo). They were transitioning back to the States after five years of living in Edinburgh, Scotland.

One day our grandson Milo asked his mother, “Is Papa famous?”

Taylor laughed and asked what prompted the question.

“Everybody knows him,” he replied.

Welcome to a small town, young man.

I have been doing a lot of online networking for business in recent weeks, having Zoom calls with people from all over North America. As we introduce one another, I find that the vast majority of them live in cities, with most of them located on either one of the coasts. When I tell them I live in a little town in Iowa, they often react with surprise. Some will even ask me about it, typically stating that they couldn’t do it and it would be too boring for them. This is often followed by a statement about needing a lot of things to do and places to go for activity and entertainment.

Fascinating.

In today’s chapter, Paul shifts the theme of his letter from personal matters (e.g. discussion of Timothy’s visit and his longing to make a personal visit of his own) to instructions in life for the spiritually young Jesus followers in Thessalonica.

Paul’s first instruction was to avoid sexual immorality. Keep in mind that generally loose sexual mores and attitudes were a hallmark of ancient Greece. As one historian described sex in the city of Athens (where Paul is writing this letter):

“Relationships between men of the same age were not at all common: rather, the standard same-sex relationship would involve an adolescent boy and an older man. Men also used female prostitutes regularly: sex could be bought cheaply in a city that was home to countless brothels, streetwalkers and female ‘entertainers’.”

Paul urges the Thessalonian believers to produce the fruit of self-control in sexual matters for their own spiritual, and physical, well-being.

He then goes on to repeat his encouragement that I wrote about in yesterday’s post, which is to increase in love “more and more.” But he then adds a general instruction for daily life, encouraging them to make it their “ambition” to lead a “quiet life.”

…make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.

It was about thirty years ago that these verses first leaped off the page and into my soul. This passage has become somewhat of a guide and a mission. I didn’t think about it when I moved to a small town from the city where I’d spent most of my life, but in retrospect, I find that it was definitely synergistic.

Yes, my life is quieter. I can get anywhere I need in ten minutes or less. I like seeing people I know everywhere. I love that people know my name when I walk into the store, a restaurant, or the pub. I love that the guys at George’s Pizza begin making our pizza as soon as they see our car pull up on Sunday. I love not dealing with the traffic, crime, and cost of a city. And, despite not having all the available activity and entertainment options of a city, Wendy and I never lack things to do nor do we ever feel that our entertainment tank is on empty.

Paul’s words to the Thessalonians have been instrumental in my life journey. I have made it my ambition to lead a quieter life, and it has greatly increased the quality of my life. Please don’t hear what I’m not saying. I don’t think one has to live in a small town to have a quieter life. I’m just saying that I have found it to personally be part of my own journey in being ambitious for more quiet.

And, in the quiet this morning, I find myself thinking of the ambitions I observe in our adventure-seeking, adrenaline-addicted, YOLO culture. I observe individuals who are so ambitious for non-stop activity and entertainment that they never have time to figure out why their relationships aren’t working, their soul feels so empty, or their minds are so constantly afraid and anxious. The answers to those things require contemplation, introspection, and conversation (and I would add prayer), and those things require quiet.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

Wayfarer's Journal

The Latest Fall 2023 thru Spring 2024

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For the last several years, I have attempted to post a recap of “The Latest” from our crew at least quarterly. Alas, I have been remiss since the end of summer last year. I’m happy to say that it had nothing to do with anything tragic or bad. In fact, the past nine months have been full of really good things, thank God (from whom all blessings flow).

So, here are the highlights from post-Labor Day 2023 through Pella Tulip Time 2024 complete with over 200 photos! Since I’m covering a lot of time, I’m going to arrange this edition of “The Latest” thematically.

Tay & Clay Move Back, and Move IN!

Taylor, Clayton, Milo, and Sylvie have made Edinburgh, Scotland home for the past five years. In 2023 it became clear that their visa would finally run out. It was time for them to return to the States. It was bittersweet for them. They will miss Scotland and all of their friends and colleagues. At the same time, they were grateful to move closer to family and friends back in Iowa. They wrapped up their lives in Scotland in the fall, enjoying Halloween parties, saying goodbye to friends, colleagues, and classmates, and packing up their lives for a move across the pond.

On December 19, 2023, the four of them moved into Papa and Yaya’s house here in Pella. They were with us through the first weekend of May 2024. Wendy and I are so grateful for the opportunity to be Papa and Yaya every day and live daily life with our kids and grandkids. We made so many great memories from the kids helping Yaya make smoothies in the morning to Milo and Papa’s video game adventures. We passed colds and flu around, suffered together, and survived to tell the tale. But, there were copious amounts of cuddling, stories, great meals, movies, running in circles, dancing in the kitchen, dress-up, and laughter.

The kids purchased a house in Des Moines in the Spring of 2024 and the four of them officially moved on the first Sunday of May. We’re excited to have them close and grateful for the memories we made living life together this past year.

MK, G, and MJ Make THREE!

Madison and Garrett continue doing life in Columbia, SC. They announced that grandbaby #3 was on the way last fall. I had the blessing of getting to visit on a business trip last fall. I got to go with Madison to her ultrasound and see our granddaughter making eyes at me via technology. Madison Jo (MJ) Anderson was born in February. She is her Daddy’s little girl, and SO CUTE! Papa and Yaya got to visit just a few weeks after she was born and enjoyed lots of cuddle time with both MJ and our grand pups, Bertha and Hazel. While in Columbia, Madison arranged for us to enjoy facials from Pout, the salon where she works. We also enjoyed some good food and an afternoon in the local bookstore (Yes! They still exist! And, this one actually served craft beer and wine while you look over the selection of books!).

Papa Dean in Pella

My parents moved to Pella in the autumn of 2022. Mom passed away in March of 2023. Dad continues to reside in independent living here in Pella where he continues to build community. At 87, he continues to battle the never-ending medical struggles that come with aging, but he remains active and independent. Dad has become well-known for his stained-glass work. He makes several small pieces to sell as ornaments but has also received some larger commissions that keep him busy on top of his personal projects for the State Fair. He joins our worship community every Sunday and we’re grateful to have him here in Pella.

Return to the “Mother Ship.” SKOL!!

Until the COVID pandemic, Wendy and I had established a tradition of an annual pilgrimage to Minneapolis each fall for a weekend of theatre, maybe baseball, and a Minnesota Vikings game. We hadn’t made the pilgrimage since 2019, but in 2023 the tradition recommenced! We combined the trip with some business we had in the Twin Cities and attended our first Monday Night Football game in which the Vikings hosted the to-be NFC Champion San Francisco 49ers with former ISU Cyclone Brock Purdy at the helm. It was a great night, and the Vikings prevailed. SKOL!

Holidays 2023

With Madison in the final trimester, we understandably didn’t get the SC crew back for the holidays. To be honest, we kept our holidays very low-key this year. My siblings all gathered for an evening together with Dad at our house, the first Christmas since Mom’s passing. We enjoyed a quiet family Christmas Day with the kids and grandkids, along with some evenings of cheer with friends as Wendy and I celebrated our 18th anniversary on New Year’s Eve. We even babysat our furry friend, Maria, as her family went skiing in Colorado.

The Medical Struggles Continue

Over the last couple of years, Wendy has endured a number of medical procedures. A rogue cut of an avocado led to surgery to repair an artery and tendons in her hand. She then had surgery to address some joint issues on the toes of each foot and a finger. Just when we thought she was through the woods, she took a bad step and broke her foot, leading to another surgery and months of rehab, walking with a scooter, and hobbling in a boot. Thankfully, we believe that’s all behind us now (God, please let that all be behind us now. Amen.).

Friends, Family, and Community

Wendy and I are so blessed with great families, an amazing community, and so many great friends with whom we get to share this life journey. We have had birthday dinners, concerts, trips to the lake, and evenings out. Our business hosted a table for Many Hands for Haiti’s annual business breakfast as Wendy and I hosted our friend and colleagues from Brooklyn, NY.

Also in the fall, Wendy and I were honored to be asked to introduce our local community theatre’s newest inductee to the Union Street Players Walk of Fame, Jana DeZwarte. We have not been involved with USP now for several years, but we continue to enjoy getting together with theatre friends. We hosted a gathering of our stage compatriots at the Vander Well Pub this Spring.

Wendy continues to watch out for her 97-year-old grandmother who lives in assisted living here in town. Her folks and our nephews and niece visit quite often as they come to town to see great-grandma.

Wendy and I also continued to serve our local Community with the annual Tulip Queen Announcement Party. Wendy is on the committee and directs the event. I get to be the Master of Ceremonies and “Tulip Court Dad” to the 12 candidates for a day. As usual, it was an amazing group of 12 ladies who all had the chops to be on the Tulip Court. We loved that his year the Tulip Queen was our dear friend, Mia, who we first met when Wendy cast her in the lead role of The Christmas Post. back in 2016.

Cruisin’ the Caribbean

Cruising has been our favorite form of vacation since our first cruise together back in 2014. This year we decided to take an 11-day cruise, our longest so far, with our friends Kev and Beck. We sailed out of Florida and cruised the Southern Caribbean on Holland America’s Eurodam. Holland America was celebrating its 150th Anniversary, and my great-grandfather sailed to America on Holland America when he emigrated back in the 1880s, though I’m certain his cruise was not as enjoyable as ours. Wendy and I had been on the Eurodam before, but this trip we were visiting ports of call we’d never been to before.

It was an enjoyable trip. Every evening of the cruise we held up at the Tamarind Bar for before-dinner cocktails and it suddenly felt like it was the place to be on the ship. We had so much fun with our bartenders Daniel and Amable, and met great friends like Alvin from Seattle.

I loved the 11 days, and it made me want to do even longer cruises in the future. A trans-ocean or round-the-world cruise is one of the few things on my bucket list. I don’t know if it will ever happen, but this trip only fueled my desire to make it happen.

Tulip Time

When you live in Pella, the years are marked by Tulip Time, the annual community festival that has made our little village a destination for hundreds of thousands of people from all over the world. Celebrating our town’s Dutch heritage and unique history is truly a community effort. Almost everyone pitches in, and most of us volunteer in multiple capacities.

Two things made this Tulip Time special.

First, Wendy and I have been portraying our town’s founding couple, H.P. and Maria Scholte in stage productions for over 15 years. We’ve been portraying the historic couple during Tulip Time festivities for a decade. We announced this year that it would be our last. It’s been a great run, and I’ll probably still make appearances as “Dominie” (i.e. Dutch for “Pastor”) Scholte upon invitation from our local Historical Society. That said, it’s time to pass the baton to a young couple who can be the Dominie and Maria for the next generation of Tulip Time visitors.

Second, as the kids prepared for their move to Des Moines, this was the first (and perhaps last) opportunity for Milo to participate in Tulip Time parades with all of his classmates and for Taylor and the kids to put on their Dutch costumes, scrub the streets, march in the parades, and do all of the things that make Tulip Time special. We even had Milo and Sylvie ride in the horse-drawn carriage with us as the Dominie and Maria.

As my Grandma Golly used to say, “There you be.” We’re caught up on “The Latest” through May. I’ll fill you in on Summer 2024 in about eight weeks or so. Cheers!

Wayfarer's Journal

The Latest: Autumn 2022

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I know, I know, I know. I’m desperately behind on the latest of the VW family exploits. Last week I posted about our trip to Scotland, but that’s not all the happened this past fall. Here’s the skinny on the rest.

It was a very difficult fall for my father. He is the younger of two brothers and my Uncle Bud was failing quickly in the fall. I took my folks up to my dad’s hometown of Le Mars to visit Bud in the hospital. I am so glad we made the trip. It would prove to be the final opportunity to see him this side of heaven.

Wendy and I continue to enjoy our local gathering of Jesus’ followers. We hosted a backyard barbecue in September along with our awesome backyard neighbors, the Garlands. Together, we hosted over 100 people for burgers, hot dogs, and a bouncy-house. The weather was perfect for the evening and it was awesome.

Of course, it’s not an official fall without American FOOTBALL (have to differentiate with kids and grandkids in the UK – GO MILO!)!!!!! We enjoyed watching our friend Nathan on the local Pella football field and watching our Vikings on the television.

My parents moved to Pella in October. They started in Wesley Life’s independent living at Pella Manor. Within a month, my mother would move into Memory Care at the Cottages of Hearthstone. It was a difficult transition, but God was so good, and the timing was perfect in so many ways. I’m so grateful that my mom got to meet her great-granddaughter, Sylvie.

Autumn is also a big time for our local community here in Pella. Our local gathering of Jesus’ followers does an Original Works Night to spotlight the artists and creatives in our midst. Original art, photography, poetry, music, and the like are presented in a fun coffeehouse atmosphere. I was asked to host the event again this year, and it was awesome. I loved the origami theme.

Our dear friends Mat and Anne McCullough-Kelly were inducted into Pella Community Theatre’s Walk-of-Fame. Wendy and I couldn’t not have been more thrilled, as Mat and Anne played a HUGE part in our own successes there over the years. They both always went above-and-beyond in so many ways, and they were more than deserving of the honor.

Wendy and I also participated, once again, in the annual Pella Tulip Queen Announcement Party. Wendy chaired the Committee this year along with her stellar directorial management of the event. I got to be the Master of Ceremonies. I’m always blown away by the incredible young ladies our community raises. There was not a single one in the final twelve who would not represent our community well (I say that every year), and I love getting to announce Court members and Tulip Queen.

So, there you go. A quick recap of Autumn. Next up: Holidays 2022.

It was a very difficult fall for my father. He is the younger of two brothers and my Uncle Bud was failing quickly in the fall. I took my folks up to my dad’s hometown of Le Mars to visit Bud in the hospital. It would prove to be the

Tom's Photos, Wayfarer's Journal

The Latest: Summer 2022

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It’s a gorgeous autumn day in Edinburg, Scotland. It has taken several weeks and a vacation across the Atlantic Ocean for me to make the time for this post. What a year 2022 has proven to be (and it’s not over yet).

This past summer was packed full of fun, both the usual and the non-usual. It began in what has become the usual way over the past twelve years, and that is at the lake with the JPs and VLs. Wendy and I arrived a little early and stayed a little late to enjoy time to ourselves and with friends Dave and Lola.

After returning to Pella, the social calendar included our support of the Pella Opera House at their annual gala.

We also enjoyed our friend, Shanae’s wedding in Des Moines. I was honored to be asked to pray a blessing over the wedding feast, and we had a lot of fun with friends. Wendy and I were anxiously awaiting the arrival of our granddaughter across the pond, which may (or may not) have prompted Wendy to offer to adopt dear little Audrey as an honorary grandchild for the evening.

We were ecstatic when, just days later, our 2nd grandchild, Sylvie Ruth, arrived. Taylor, Clayton, and Milo welcomed our new bundle of joy in Scotland on June 28th while Wendy and I were at the lake to celebrate a quiet July 4th (Taylor’s birthday, btw) holiday. I toasted Sylvie’s birth with a pint and a stogie on the deck while scoring the Chicago Cubs game. Other than having to spend a few extra days in the hospital to hit all of her health markers, everything went according to plan. So excited to have sweet Sylvie with us.

July ushered in another wedding. I was honored to officiate the joining of Megan and Tanner at the Hotel Fort Des Moines. Megan has pretty much been another daughter and we’ve had so much fun getting to know Tanner. It was a fabulous wedding and an amazing reception.

Our friends Kevin and Linda were back in Pella for five weeks this summer and we tried to make the most of it by getting together several times over those weeks. We enjoyed a summer evening of drinks and stogies on the patio. Enjoyed another evening at the Atkins Oasis. The VLs joined us for a Cubs night at the Vander Well Pub, and the six of us helped celebrate Pella’s 175th birthday at a special Pella Soiree one evening.

We also enjoyed visits from a niece and nephew this summer. Our nephew Asher joined us for a night along with his dad, Wendy’s brother Josh. We actually got to host our niece Lydia for a few days while her folks, (Wendy’s sis) Becky and Court got a few nights off. We had fun taking Lydia and Miss Camille to Pella’s new SmashPark. Uncle Tom got to take Lydia to Adventureland. It was her first visit to an amusement park.

We actually had even more gatherings with the Hall and Vander Hart crews. Wendy’s Uncle Brad and Aunt Barb moved back to Pella from Dubuque and we had multiple gatherings at their place. Wendy’s brother Jesse also came to town with his girlfriend Ania, and we enjoyed a great lunch with them and Wendy’s folks. We also enjoyed our nephew Owen’s first birthday gala.

As far as the Vander Well crew goes, all is well. Grandson Milo graduated from Nursery School and started primary school. All is well for Madison, Garrett, and the Rotties down in South Carolina. Papa Dean won both a first-place blue ribbon and a third-place white ribbon for the two stained-glass pieces he entered in the Iowa State Fair. The folks began considering a move to Pella this summer. Mom’s Alzheimer’s continues to progress, but she still manages to be adorably cute. One day on FaceTime my father was telling a long story and was holding his phone so that mom and I were basically staring at each other while Dad talked. I started making faces at her and she started making faces back at me. She’s so funny.

The summer ended with a traditional adult weekend at the lake with the JPs and VLs. It’s always a wonderful weekend of feasting and sharing of life. We spent more time chilling out at the Playhouse this summer and less time out and about. We ended the weekend with me making a double batch of the Vander Well family’s favorite Dutch treat, eireflensjes. The perfect bookend to wrap up the season.

Chapter-a-Day

Trouble and Peace

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Trouble and Peace (CaD John 16) – Wayfarer

“They will put you out of the synagogue; in fact, the time is coming when anyone who kills you will think they are offering a service to God.” 
John 16:2 (NIV)

The little Iowa town where Wendy and I live has a fascinating history. It was founded and designed by a pastor who was escaping persecution in the Netherlands. That sounds odd to most people since the Netherlands is known for being a place of tolerance. In the early 1800s, however, the King of the Netherlands, and the government, controlled the church of the Netherlands. Pastors were told what to preach, and were threatened and punished if they disobeyed.

There was a group of rebellious young pastors who led an organized secession from the state church. Some were imprisoned for it. The leader of the secessionist movement was H.P. Scholte, and it was during this period of conflict with the state church of the Netherlands that he decided he wanted to experience the freedom of religion and the freedom of speech guaranteed to all Americans. In 1847, he led hundreds of followers to the Iowa prairie and created a town out of nothing.

In America, Scholte fully exercised his freedoms. Always a maverick, he refused to join any denomination and eventually built his own church which he led as a local, independent, non-denominational congregation. He practiced his freedom of speech by publishing his own paper, loudly speaking out for the abolition of slavery, and getting involved in the political process. He became a friend of Abraham Lincoln. The faith and spirit that Scholte and his wife imbued in this town is still evident for those who have eyes to see it.

Today’s chapter is the third of four chapters that John dedicates to all the things Jesus told His followers on the night before His crucifixion. Almost 20% of his biography is dedicated to those few hours on a Thursday evening.

Two chapters ago, I observed that all of the players present in the “fall” in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3) are represented and/or referenced on this fateful evening. Again in today’s chapter, Jesus references the “prince of this world.” Jesus points to the fact that the events of this evening are part of a larger story; They are part of the Great Story.

What fascinated me as I, once again, read Jesus words to His followers this morning was both the warning and the promise with which today’s chapter is bookended. Jesus begins by warning His followers of the difficulties they will soon face: institutional persecution and the threat of death. Jesus wasn’t lying. All but one of the eleven disciples listening to these words (Judas was, at that moment, carrying out his betrayal) would be killed, martyred, for carrying out Jesus’ mission. At the end of the chapter, Jesus reiterates the “trouble” that they will experience in this world adding that “in Him” they would find peace amidst the conflict.

As I contemplate this, I am reminded of three things:

First, that when Wendy and I attended our local gathering of Jesus’ followers yesterday, it was the result of a legacy of believers who literally risked life and limb to escape “trouble” to carve out lives in the freedom of America.

Second, I am reminded of the “trouble” that many followers of Jesus face this day. I recently read that in Nigeria, 43,000 followers of Jesus have been killed in the past 12 years. An additional 18,000 have permanently disappeared. 17,500 churches have been attacked. There are 49 other countries in which the risk of “trouble” for being a follower of Jesus is rated “very high” to “extreme.” Those are dangers a follower of Jesus in America can largely ignore because it’s not my reality.

Which brings me to my third thought. In recent weeks, almost 60 churches have been attacked and burned in Canada, and last week a group of followers exercising their right to freely assemble and publicly worship were physically attacked by Antifa while police allegedly stood by and did nothing. “Trouble” is suddenly hits closer to home in ways I never expected to see in my lifetime.

In the quiet this morning, I’m reminded of Jesus’ promise which was a very direct contrast statement: “In this world you will have trouble,” He stated, while “In me you will have peace.” The latter was never intended to negate or escape the former. Rather, it was intended as the means to endure it.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

Tom's Photos, Wayfarer's Journal

The Latest: June ’20 to May ’21

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Wendy and I arrived at the lake last night. We’re getting things ready for our annual Memorial Day Weekend celebration with the JPs and VLs. Hello summer!

The last time I posted on “The Latest” was just about a year ago, and what a year it has been. 2020 was the year of COVID-19 and we weathered the storm like everyone else while managing to do so with our close family and friends.

Here are the highlights from the last year… the year of Covid.

June 2020 in Kansas City

Wendy and I enjoyed a really strange weekend in Kansas City amidst the pandemic. We went to see our longtime friends, Matt and Tara. Despite a narrow list of things we could do, we managed to get out for a wonderful evening with our friends and enjoy Covid-KC.

Grandma Vander Hart Turns 93

In July of 2020 the Vander Hart family gathered to celebrate Henrietta’s 93rd birthday. Since none of her children are in Pella anymore, Wendy has been helping her with her daily needs, shopping, doctor’s appointments, and etc. Wendy says with all the years Grandma watched her when she was a kid, she’s glad she has this opportunity to return the love.

Fourth of the July at the Lake

The JPs, VLs, and Schempers joined us at the lake for the Fourth of July this past year. Wendy and I actually spent less time at the lake last summer than ever. We got down just for the holiday weekends.

College Reunion

For the past few years my college roommate, Steve Elliott, and I have been talking about actually getting together. In July, we made it happen by meeting each other half-way in Galena, IL. Steve drove his wife’s Mustang convertible and we spent the afternoon exploring the backroads of the Mississippi River valley through northwest Illinois and southwest Wisconsin, making a stop when we stumbled upon a craft brewery.

Labor Day Weekend at the Lake

While Memorial Day and Fourth of July are typically family affairs, the Labor Day weekend has been a traditional adult weekend for the JPs, VLs, and V-Dubs. Always a nice way to celebrate the end of summer. Even summer of COVID.

Tay and Clay’s Highlands Wedding with a Stegosaurus

It was a beautiful wedding. We wish we could have been there. We wish anyone could have been there. Taylor and Clayton had hoped to have a private ceremony in Edinburgh with their close friends and then a quiet dinner. Then lockdowns nixed that. So, they opted for an even more private ceremony in the middle of the Scottish highlands with just the photographer and Milo. Milo requested to be a Stegosaurus for the special occasion, so, why not (at least for part of the time)?

Autumn Trip to Austin, Texas

Long before anyone had heard of the Coronavirus, we had scheduled a trip to Austin with our friends Kev and Beck. We had to do so to secure the lodging we wanted. We were determined to do enjoy what we could. As is always the case with the four of us, Beck had thoroughly investigated options and restrictions in order to structure an entire calendar of “fun” places where we could do what we love: enjoy good food, good drink, and good conversation.

Crowning a New Tulip Queen

A couple of years ago I was asked to be Master of Ceremonies for Pella’s annual Tulip Queen Announcement Party (TQAP), which is to say “it’s not a pageant!” Realizing that I’d had a blast doing it and would be doing it again, Wendy decided to sign-on for a six-year stint as a member of the TQAP Committee. So it was that we enjoyed working with the 13 young ladies (who were all amazing) to prepare for their presentations and I was honored to announce the new Tulip Queen and her Court for Pella’s 2021 Tulip Time.

Thanksgiving 2020

Thanksgiving was a quiet family gathering at our house for a small gathering of Wendy’s family.

Christmas and Covid 2020

Wendy and I felt so blessed to have the whole fam at our house for Christmas, and an entire Christmas Day together. Tay, Clay, and Milo arrived in early December. They spent a few weeks with us, and a few weeks with other family. Madison and Garrett arrived in time for Christmas. Ya-Ya (Grandma Wendy) enjoyed Milo being her little helper with Christmas cookies, smoothies, and other cooking duties. We had a Christmas cookie decorating contest and the adults all participated in a Christmas cocktail contest. There were no losers.

To honest, Wendy’s birthday was overshadowed this year as she played hostess, baker, cook, and caretaker. Nevertheless, her heart was full of joy. We even took the rare opportunity of being together to have some family portraits taken.

Christmas Day began with opening stockings before Ya-Ya’s amazing Christmas breakfast complete with cinnamon rolls. Gifts were opened and we enjoyed an equally amazing charcuterie spread for lunch/dinner as we binged on The Crown. I got to use the nifty Lifegoo precision screwdriver set in my stocking to repair Lightning McQueen for Milo.

The Andersons headed back and the Vander-Boeyinks headed to Des Moines for a week of Christmas celebrations with family there. Wendy and I had originally scheduled a cruise to celebrate our 15th Anniversary (New Year’s Eve) but that had long-since been cancelled. I believe we spent a quiet evening at home and went to bed early.

The ‘Rona came to our house on January 3rd with Tay, Clay and Milo’s return. All five of us ended up getting it. Taylor, Wendy, and I had relatively minor, flu-like symptoms. For me it was a day-or-two with body aches followed by a few weeks with zero-energy. Clay and Milo were asymptomatic. Their return to Scotland got delayed due to our quarantine together, and we made the best of our unexpected, extended family time. They eventually flew back to the UK in February.

Getting Out of Dodge

In February, Kev and I were commiserating about feeling a mutual case of cabin fever due to COVID. Deciding we’d like to look at different walls for a few days, we scooted down to the lake for a week of guy-time and working remotely from a different location.

Lake Work Weekend

We returned to the lake in April for a work weekend with the JPs and VLs. It’s hard to believe that it’s been over a decade since we built the Playhouse and there was a fairly decent list of things that needed sprucing up, repaired, updated, and improved.

JP discovered that our dock had been torn from the gangway due to the low water level this winter. He, along with our neighbor, got it repaired. There was a lot of power-washing, labeling, clearing out, and organization.

It also happened to be Shay’s birthday that weekend, so we celebrated the senorita at our favorite local Mexican haunt at the lake.

Easter 2021

Easter was a quiet affair at our house. My folks and Wendy’s folks came to Pell and Grandma Vander Hart joined us for a light lunch and an afternoon of family time. It was so good to have my parents here. They spent so much of the year in lockdown in their senior community. To actually have them physically present was such a blessing.

Weekend in “COLA”

Wendy and I headed to South Carolina in April to spend a long weekend with Madison and G. It was our first time in SC since their wedding in October of 2019, and the first visit to the house they purchased last year. We also got to meet our grand dog, Bertha. Madison arranged for both Wendy and me to have facials at the salon where she works, Pout.

We enjoyed a quiet weekend and enjoyed some great restaurants in Columbia. G’s family were in town that weekend and we all got together for breakfast on Saturday morning. It was nice to spend time with them, as well. G demonstrated his grilling skills for us before we left on Sunday, and on the way to the airport we stopped to pick-up a new grand dog, a puppy named Hazel.

April Birthdays

I got to wear a sombrero like Shay, when my bud Matthew took me out for lunch to celebrate my birthday at the end of April. Actually, Kev, Beck and I all have birthdays within 13 days of one another, so it’s become a tradition to get together to celebrate each year. This year the celebration was in Pella. We enjoyed some time at the Peanut Pub and the rooftop of Butcher’s Brewhuis before retiring to Vander Well Manor with George’s Pizza.

Tulip Time and Mother’s Day2021

There was a modified Tulip Time this year, but at least it didn’t get completely cancelled like it did last year. Wendy and did our annual turn as Pella’s founding couple. We make a couple of pop-up appearances each day of the festival to give a little spiel about the history of Pella. There was a great turnout for the festival and, as usual, we got stopped many times each day to have our pictures taken with new friends from all over.

Not to be redundant, but the year of Covid-19 was a year of a lot of redundancy in so many ways. Mother’s Day (the Sunday of Tulip Time weekend) we hosted Wendy’s grandma, folks, and my folks. Wendy’s brother, Josh, was also back in Iowa for a visit. We had a light lunch and shared family stories around the table. It was good, once again, just to be together.

  • Matthew & Olivia Burch

And, there you have it. The highlights of the past year. More memories to be made this weekend as Memorial Day kicks off another summer.

Wayfarer Podcast

A Dentist on a Mission from God

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On this Wayfarer Weekend (WW) podcast I welcome Dr. Eric Recker to the Vander Well Pub for a conversation about his mission from God that sprung out of the COVID-19 pandemic and one of the most difficult days of his life. On our conversational journey, we intersect on exceptional situations, finding relationships, and how essential it is to have good companions on this earthly trek.

(WW) Dentist: On a Mission from God – Wayfarer

Theatre Journal, Wayfarer's Journal

From the Archives: Wendy’s “Walk of Fame” Intro

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In the fall of 2018, m’luv Wendy was inducted into our local community theatre’s Walk of Fame. She gave me the honor of introducing her that evening. As I was going through some old files this weekend, I found the text of the introduction that I prepared and delivered that night. Please indulge me. I’d like to post this tribute to Wendy so that it will be preserved on the world-wide interweb until, and perhaps beyond, the apocalypse. She deserves that.

“I have taken a billion photographs of Wendy. I take a lot of photographs period, and over the years I’ve noticed that I have this mysterious internal catch in my spirit when a certain photograph rises to the level of a personal favorite. I don’t always know why. I just know it’s special, and I have to spend time with it to figure it out. This photograph of Wendy is one of those. I’ve meditated on why it’s special and I’d like to share a few reasons why.

The first time I saw Wendy Hall was in the same place this photograph was taken. Our daughter Taylor and I were new residents of Pella and had been cast in USP’s South Pacific. We sat at the back of the Joan Kuyper Farver Auditorium as Wendy, Prop Master for the show, made her way to the front to make an announcement. I saw her from behind just like this photograph as she strode with purpose and intensity up the aisle toward the stage. First impressions. Oh my, that hair – which I’ve come to love as metaphorical of the wild-child, the explosion of passion tinged with red.

Wendy stood on that stage and gave the well-known rule for all large cast shows filled with children and teens: “Look!” she said, “Rule number one! If it’s not yours, DON’T TOUCH IT!” That little bit of a thing with the wild, red-streaked hair spoke with such assured, intense authority. I knew in that moment I was NOT going to touch a prop that wasn’t mine. I was a little scared.

In this photo, we see Wendy in the off-stage darkness, which is where I first got to actually know Wendy Hall during South Pacific. What I learned about Wendy back stage is that she knew theatre, she cared about doing theatre well, and in her arena of responsibility things were going to be done well down to the minute details. While on-stage as Captain Brackett, I had to eat a sandwich.

“What kind of sandwich do you like?” she asked me in one early rehearsal. 

“Why?” I asked honestly, caught off-guard by the question.

“If you have to eat a sandwich on stage it might as well be something you like,” she responded as if it was the most logical question in the world. 

But as a stage veteran, it wasn’t the most logical question in the world. Anyone who’s been involved in theatre of any kind, especially in community theatre, knows that props are thrown together at the last minute using whatever is expedient by half-hearted volunteers who aren’t sure what they’re doing. I expected a sandwich that was two slices of cheap white bread hastily purchased at the Dollar General before tech rehearsal two weeks ago and by opening night it’s dry and crusty with hints of mold.

But Wendy Hall was in charge. She was Prop Master. You’re going to have a freshly made sandwich, a real sandwich that is something you like. Because, I was Commander Bracket (dammit!), and Commander Bracket would eat a sandwich he wanted prepared for him by the mess cook. 

In one of my South Pacific scenes, I had to sit on stage for a period of time while action and dialogue were focused elsewhere. During the final weeks of rehearsal, each night I found on Captain Bracket’s desk clipboard different things to read. A Shakespeare sonnet one night, a list of corny jokes the next, a Robert Frost poem. Prop Master Wendy Hall figured if you have to sit there on stage looking at a clipboard you might as well have something interesting to read. I’d never met a Prop Master or Stage Manager who cared about the actors and their experience down to the smallest of details. 

An unknowing person looking at this photograph is likely to see only a dark, contrasting figure. A two-dimensional shape: “Female figure in black.” Over the years I’ve observed that people who don’t really know Wendy, this is what they see. A simple figure contrasted by her intensity, her strong opinions, her kick-butt and take-charge attitude which is so easy to dismiss just as simply: Female figure in black. 

I look at this photo and observe she is not in the spotlight but in the shadows off-stage because Wendy, the amazingly capable and talented leading lady, has no need for the spotlight. In fact, she does her best work on-stage during the rehearsal process. Her best work off-stage is in the shadows where she is intensely focused on what’s happening on-stage and thinking of every detail that will make this production sing – not just for the audience but for the actors and the crew members. She cares, not just for the show that takes place on stage but the experience of the entire production from the first audition to the post-production cast party. Those who only see and hear an oft intense director demanding exactly what she expects and exactly the ways she wants it do not see her on the couch at home obsessing about actors not having to be at rehearsal if they don’t have to be, parents being able to count on a well-thought-out rehearsal schedule that will make for worry-free planning, or people having a great experience from first to last.

When I look at the woman in this photograph I see someone who knows what she’s doing. She’s standing tall, intensely focused, doing the work, orchestrating the action; Pen in one hand and the other hand open and ready to edit the show and the production if they are the right changes to advance the quality of the show and the good of the whole.

From 2003 through 2017 Wendy has been credited with 43 roles in USP productions, only 12 of them as an actor. Seven of those 12 roles I had the privilege of playing opposite her, and there is no one I would rather be on stage with than Wendy because I’ve rarely met another actor who shares my passion for the process of bringing a character to stage. Thirty-one of Wendy’s roles were off-stage roles: Producer, Director, Assistant Director, Front of House, Make-up, Costumes, Props, Publicity – she’s done it all and that doesn’t count some 15 years of continuous service on the USP Board of Directors, organizing Award Nights, helping organize Drama Camp registrations, Picnics,  Costume Shop help, and of course making lots-and-lots of cheesecake.

The final thing I want to point out in this photo is the mystery it makes me feel. You don’t see this woman. You don’t really see her. You see just an impression of her. When I look at this photo, I both enjoy the mystery and experience the selfish satisfaction of being a secret keeper. I do know her. I have been granted the privilege of seeing what no one else sees. 

My theme song for Wendy, and I’m not sure I’ve ever shared this with anyone, contains these lyrics:

Tonight as I stand inside the rain
Ev’rybody knows
That Baby’s got new clothes
But lately I see her ribbons and her bows
Have fallen from her curls
She takes just like a woman, yes, she does
She makes love just like a woman, yes, she does
And she aches just like a woman
But she breaks just like a little girl

In this journey of theatre with Union Street Players I have shared her public triumphs and wiped away her private tears. I can tell that both spring from love: love of God, love of doing things well, love of theatre, love of this crazy organization, and most of all love for each of you with a depth and passion you likely know not – from this two-dimensional, female figure in black.

May I present to you my leading lady, my best producer, my life director, my muse, and my partner on Life’s journey. M’luv! And the newest member of Union Street Players Walk of Fame, Wendy Vander Well...”

Tom's Photos, Wayfarer's Journal

The Latest: Spring/Summer 2020

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The last time I shared an update of what the family has been up to, it was March. Wendy and I had just completed the longest stretch of travel in the shortest amount of time in our lives. Our sojourns included but were not limited to Madison’s wedding in Columbia, SC, Suzanna’s wedding in Mazatlan, Mexico, Christmas in London, New Year’s in Dublin, and our vacation and cruise in Florida and the Caribbean. That doesn’t include all of my work travel between those trips. Basically, between October and March, I was at home less than 50% of the time. So my last update on this blog happened after Wendy and I had just returned from a cruise with our friends and there was rising concern about this pesky little virus from China.

That seems like it was another lifetime. From non-stop travel to staying at home all the time. What a contrast.

So, I guess I should start off by letting everyone know that everyone in our family is healthy and safe. Living in a small town in rural Iowa has its advantages. For Wendy and me, that means a total of only 73 cases of COVID-19 in our county with zero deaths. A few of Wendy’s family members had the virus but quarantined and were fine.

So let’s go back in time…

(Love that meme!)

Right before our cruise and right before COVID lockdown, Wendy and I had been asked if we would allow our home to be the location for a special birthday blow-out for our friend, Sarah. Of course, we said “yes,” and we loved that our home could be used for the event. It was a great night of meeting lots of new people, serving as hosts to our friends and their guests, and celebrating Sarah’s big day.

Of course, right after we returned from our cruise the world stopped. All of my business travel was canceled. The lockdown also happened right before St. Patrick’s Day, which happens to be one of our favorite holidays. Thankfully, the Vander Well Pub right down the stairs in our basement. Wendy and I celebrated in a private affair.

Private St. Patrick’s Day party at the Vander Well Pub. Small crowd. Had to use the selfie-stick. Slaintè!

For a couple of months, Wendy and I barely got out of the house. In some ways, it was a nice change from the plethora of travel we’d just finished. Like most people, we took the opportunity to accomplish tasks that had been on the to-do list for years. This included stringing up a shade-sail and lights over our patio. We were so excited to use the grill for the first time this spring.

Our kids, Madison and Garrett, made a brief weekend visit (they were the only passengers on the plane) to Iowa in early April. Because my parents (who had never met Garrett in person) were unable to attend the wedding in South Carolina and Garrett had never been to Pella, they wanted to make the trip and it was awesome to have them. Of course, they couldn’t actually meet my parents in lockdown, but they stood on the sidewalk and spoke to them through the folks’ second-story window. C’est la vie.

About that time, I was playing a little driveway basketball with m’man, Nathan, and took a tumble while chasing the basketball into the yard. In one swift move, age met with athletically-challenged coordination. I chipped an ankle bone, strained my Achilles tendon, and tore my calf. Ugh. Welcome to weeks of crutches and sleeping in a recliner followed by several weeks on hobbling in a bionic-boot.

I continue to teach on occasion among our local gathering of Jesus’ followers and volunteer in leading the teaching team, but even that has been weird. Like most churches, we went to live-streaming the service from an empty sanctuary to those watching on YouTube at home. This year, Wendy made a lovely Easter breakfast and we ate as we attended Sunday services on the couch in our living room.

Happy Easter!

On a couple of occasions, I also got the chance to join our friend, Jenny, in hosting the eerily Today-like pre-and-post-service on-air chat.

Wendy and I made good use of the patio on my birthday. Of course, COVID meant that the celebration was limited, so we invited the VLs (who moved into the neighborhood! Woot! Woot!) over to cookout and celebrate one more orbit around the sun.

Of course, celebrating May fourth is always important.

May the fourth be with you…always.

Spring is when Wendy and I are usually busy portraying our town’s founding couple at the annual Pella Tulip Festival. The festival was canceled along with every other event in the known world, but by May things were starting to begin a scaled opening and we were desperately ready to get out of the house. Our friends Kev and Beck brought their kids to Pella for a day of enjoying the tulips, even if there was no festival.

While our business has been, understandably, slow, Wendy has kept busy this year working as the studio manager of a new yoga here in Pella: Selah Studio. The studio is owned by our friends the VLs and it has been holding classes in various rented spaces while they got the studio space uptown ready for prime time. Wendy and I were so excited when we got the opportunity to join them to pray over and bless the space.

In the world of COVID-correctness we tried very hard to balance being safe and wise with continuing to live life. While we stayed away from most social situations, we considered our inner-circle of friends the “family” with whom we do life. So it was, that Wendy and her girlfriends decided to have an old-fashioned girls’ sleepover at our house and I was politely asked to vacate the premises for a night and a day. So, my friend Kev and I took his son, Harry, to the lake for a little male rite-of-passage weekend before the young man headed off to forge his own path in life. This dudes weekend with father and son had been discussed for years. I was so glad we finally got to make it happen!

Our “family” normally spends Memorial Day at the lake together, so we kept up our tradition. Always a fun time with the crew.

My folks continue to hang in there through the COVID craziness. Their retirement community locked down pretty tight, but they were given a special dispensation to go to the lake for a long weekend with me and my sister. We tried to remember the last time we spent a weekend together, just the four of us, which we figured was probably sometime in the late 1980s. It was a great weekend reliving memories and spending time together at the Playhouse. Dad and I fixed the dock light together. Jody and I helped dad alter his Memoji so that it actually looked like him. We went for boat rides, spent the mornings on the deck and the afternoons on the dock. It was a great time of making memories.

As June continued we realized a years-long dream of getting the friends together for a Godfather night. The JPs and VLs came to VW Manor for a really amazing Italian dinner. Wendy made Chicken Parmesan (so good) and fresh-baked Italian bread (so, so good). Dinner was followed by a showing of the original Godfather. After the movie, we enjoyed Cannoli (yes, we left the gun) as we talked about the movie. It was awesome.

As for the rest of our crew: Tay, Clay, and Milo are still living in Edinburgh, Scotland (way too far away for Papa and Ya-Ya’s liking). A HUGE congratulations are in order for Clayton for finishing his doctorate from the University of Edinburgh while navigating life with a new and unexpected wee-one. Clay has been hired to participate in a three-year research project, and we’re really proud of him. Milo is two-and-a-half years old and is totally into dinosaurs and fire trucks. Taylor continues to work for storii.com and loves advancing the cause of care for Alzheimer’s and Dementia in our world. They recently got out of lockdown and celebrated Taylor’s 30th birthday with their favorite team of Iowa ex-pats in Scotland.

Meanwhile, Madison and Garrett purchased their first house in Columbia, South Carolina and they adopted our first-ever granddog, Bertha. Garrett continues in medical device sales and Madison continues to work in development for the Governor’s STEM high school in South Carolina.

So, that’s the skinny on February through June 2020. Cheers!

Chapter-a-Day

“LandBNB.ORG”

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Dear friend, you are faithful in what you are doing for the brothers and sisters, even though they are strangers to you. They have told the church about your love. Please send them on their way in a manner that honors God.
3 John 5-6

A few months ago our friend asked to use our house to throw a semi-surprise party for his wife. It was a blast. This past Saturday, Wendy and I were blessed to host members of her family from out of town for lunch. Tonight we have friends staying with us for the night in our home. This Friday evening a small group of Wendy’s oldest and dearest friends are having a girls’ night at our house. Had it not been for the COVID-19 pandemic, this weekend would have been our little town’s annual Tulip Time festival. Our house would typically have been filled with family for the weekend.

Hospitality is something that Wendy does extremely well, and something that we enjoy doing together. One of the motivating factors for building our house was the simple ability to provide hospitality for others. Relatives, friends, children, friends of children, and even friends of friends have stayed with us. The blessing is ours.

The realities of the Jesus movement in its first 300 years are typically lost on modern readers. The tens of thousands of Jesus’ followers met regularly in people’s homes scattered across the Roman Empire. Communication was poor making organization and oversight difficult, and sometimes impossible. That’s why much of what we refer to as the “Books” of the New Testament are actually letters that were written to be delivered, read, and sometimes copied and broadcast to all the other house churches of all the other believers. The letters would have to be carried, and the deliverer(s) (for safety is was common to send two) would need lodging and food. Inns were not great places in those days and typically doubled as brothels. It was imperative that the network of house churches double as the “LandBnB.org” of that day, offering safe lodging and hospitality for fellow believers.

Today’s chapter is another short letter that tradition ascribes to John. It is essentially a letter of recommendation for Demetrius to a house church leader named Gaius. The letter commends Gaius for his reputation as a Five-Star hospitality provider (compared to the One-Star rating John gave to another house church leader named Diotrephes). His letter provided Gaius with John’s Five-Star rating of Demetrius as a guest.

In the quiet this morning I find myself thinking about the gift and art of hospitality. Sure, AirBnB and others have turned many private residences into pseudo-inns for profit. That’s cool, but that’s not the kind of hospitality out of generosity that John was calling upon from Gaius. The “LandBnB.org” that John and early believers depended upon was a non-profit enterprise founded on generosity. Providing a warm and comfortable place that’s generously given with hospitable blessing truly is, I believe, a spiritual gift. And, as Wendy and I have discovered, the profit is joy.