God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen. 1 Peter 4:10-11 (NLT)
Many years ago I was serving on staff at a local church. A couple in the church had an adult son and his family who had moved back in with them. The son had gone to seminary and had become a pastor. His first church experience was abysmal. The church released him from his service and he could not find another church who wanted to hire him. So, he and the family moved in with mom and dad.
I spent some time with the unemployed young pastor. The church, in an effort to be an encouragement to him, allowed him to fill the pulpit a few Sundays. It quickly became clear to everyone that there was a problem. The young man had an incredible gift for knowledge. He was a tremendous theologian and thinker. He was able to reason through and grasp some of the most complex theological concepts. The problem was, he was socially awkward around people and when he preached it was utterly painful to listen to him. He was convinced, however, that he was going to be a pastor whether he had the personal skill set to do it well or not.
Along the journey I’ve noticed a common trend in fellow believers: We desire to be (or believe we are) gifted in ways we are not. A administrative pastor with no gift for preaching insists on subjecting his flock to his poor communication skills. A gifted musician and worship leader insists on preaching an awkward, rambling mini-sermon between each song. While their music ushers in a movement of the Spirit, their attempts at teaching between songs brings the movement of the Spirit to a screeching halt. A person with all sorts of desire and musical ability still can’t sing on key and insists on subjecting the church’s ears to their pitch imperfect strains.
Perhaps it is because our areas of giftedness seem so, well, natural. “I’m not special. I’ve always been good at that. That’s boring. What I’d really like to be is….” I’ve come to recognize this as a subtle form of envy. I really want to preach like he does, sing like she does, have a position of leadership like him, or have her knack for hospitality. It begs the question: Do I really want to glorify God, or am I seeking after what I feel would glorify myself?
The organized church tends to be very focused at helping people discover their spiritual gifts. We have tests and workshops and study guides and books that cover the subject in every way imaginable. What we are not very good at is confronting people who are chasing after ways that they are not gifted and helping direct their focus within the boundaries of their giftedness.
Today, I’m thinking about the young man with the gift of knowledge and theology. I wonder if he continued to chase after what the ways he was not gifted, or if he ever found the path to utilize the gifts God gave him. I hope it is the latter. We are all on our own journey. I pray we each find the road to utilizing the spiritual gifts God gave us.