Black Sheep Family

…and though Judah was the strongest of his brothers and a ruler came from him, the rights of the firstborn belonged to Joseph.
1 Chronicles 5:2 (NIV)

Along my life journey, I had a friend enter my story unexpectedly. This person may take the prize for being the most tragic individual I’ve personally met on my earthly journey. What are you supposed to do as a teenager when you borrow your dad’s car for a date but have to clean up the blood your father left in the back seat and the trunk before picking up your date? Talk about being haunted by your past. This was a heartbreaking story of a child who dealt with more than any child should have to deal with in life. It was a life that ended just as tragically.

In today’s chapter, the Chronicler shares the genealogy of the three tribes who settled east of the Jordan River. These tribes would be part of the northern kingdom of Israel that broke away from Judah and refused to recognize the lineage of King David as monarch. They were all swept away into exile by the Assyrian Empire where they remained at the time of the Chronicler’s writing.

Two prevailing thoughts come to me as I meditate on today’s chapter. First, the Chronicler once again makes it clear that he is primarily interested in the tribe of Judah, from which the Dynastic line of David hails. He makes this evident. Having established this, I find it interesting that he doesn’t shy away from presenting the genealogy of the tribes he would likely consider “black sheep.”

The tribes the Chronicler lists in today’s chapter were the rebels who shunned the tribe of Judah and David’s line. Reuben, in particular, was the dishonored firstborn who lost his paternal blessing. Unlike the Chronicler and his ancestors from Judah, who returned from exile, these tribes remained scattered across the old Assyrian empire.

But they are still family. They are still part of the story.

As I’ve explored my family’s stories on both paternal and maternal sides, I’ve discovered rifts and feuds. Mind you, I discovered nothing outside of the normal conflicts and scandals that are part of the mess that comes with being part of any family. One of the hardest things about family is that it’s not something we get to choose. My mind wanders to my friend cleaning up the blood their father left in the backseat. I can’t imagine.

As a disciple of Jesus, I cannot help but consider Jesus’ thoughts on family which are somewhat conflicting. His own flesh-and-blood mother and siblings once attempted to take control believing Jesus to have lost His mind (Mark 3:21), and Jesus responds by providing an expanded view of family. “Who are my mother and brothers?” Jesus asked before gesturing to all of His followers and declaring them family. Jesus would go on to acknowledge that many who choose to follow Him would be required to leave flesh-and-blood family behind, though he promised they would find far more family ahead than they left behind.

In the quiet this morning, I find my head and my heart holding the tension between honoring, loving, and serving my flesh-and-blood family while acknowledging that I have friends whom I consider family. It’s easy to fall into an either-or, binary mentality on either side of the issue. I find Jesus’ example to be “both-and.” Yes, He seemed to diminish His family when they thought He was out of His mind, but He also used his dying breath to ensure that a spiritual “brother” (John) would care for His physical mother, Mary. This, despite the fact that Jesus had multiple flesh-and-blood younger brothers who were socially responsible for caring for her.

Then, of course, there is the larger reality of genetics which proves that we all came from the same woman. In many ways, Jesus’ teaching is simply pointing to a much larger truth that may only be seen with perfect clarity in eternity. We humans are all one family, whether we are willing to acknowledge it or not. I’m glad that the Chronicler acknowledged his black sheep family members. I find a spiritual lesson in his honesty.