“Here is the king’s spear,” David answered. “Let one of your young men come over and get it. The Lord rewards everyone for their righteousness and faithfulness. The Lord delivered you into my hands today, but I would not lay a hand on the Lord’s anointed.As surely as I valued your life today, so may the Lord value my life and deliver me from all trouble.”
1 Samuel 26: 22-24 (NIV)

For my language requirement in high school I took German. On a regular basis our teacher, Frau Zembles, would start class by shutting the door and loudly announcing: “Ein schtick papier!” (“One sheet of paper!”). I and my classmates would groan. It was a pop-quiz.

Today’s chapter is fascinating because it feels strangely familiar. It’s like experiencing déjà vu on David’s wilderness journey. David once again has Saul completely at his mercy. Once again, Saul is pursuing him unjustly. Once again, David refuses to seize the throne by violence.

Yet this chapter is not a repetition. It is a test.
In chapter 24, David passed the test once.
In chapter 26, he must pass it again.

As a pilgrim on this spiritual journey, I’ve come to observe that God rarely gives final exams. He’s more likely to pop-up unexpectedly announcing “Ein schtick papier!”

David’s location is once again betrayed to Saul. Saul, despite having previously given up pursing David, once again gathers the troops to hunt David down. David finds the King and his soldiers sleeping deeply in the middle of the night. Saul’s spear is thrust into the ground by his head next to a water jug.

David’s companion sees the opportunity to kill Saul. Once again, David refuses. Instead, he takes the spear and the jug. He walks a safe distance away, then he wakes up the camp to announce what he’d done. Once again, he confronts Saul with the fact that he had the opportunity to kill him – but didn’t. Then he returns Saul’s spear to him.

Saul’s spear.

Throughout these chapters Saul’s spear becomes an emblem of his power, paranoia, and violence. Earlier he hurled it at David and Jonathan. Now David quietly removes it from Saul’s side. Without striking a blow, David symbolically demonstrates that Saul’s power is already slipping away.

Saul once again admits wrongdoing. Yet nothing changes. What a sad portrait of confession without repentance. Saul feels remorse, but he never truly turns.

As I meditated on the episode this morning it struck me that David isn’t merely resisting evil. He’s resisting justification. And, that’s harder.

I know what it feels like to hold Saul’s spear. I saw the person’s face in my mind as I read the chapter. The person who wronged me, lied about me, and wounded me. The person who attacked my reputation. And then suddenly, I possessed the opportunity to strike back — to deal a crippling blow to their life and to see the person publicly humiliated.

And because I’d been hurt, the idea of retaliation felt righteous.

But in that moment God stood at the door announcing, “Ein schtick papier!”

David teaches me that having the opportunity to wound someone is not the same thing as having permission. This may be one of the most important leadership lessons in the entire Great Story. Character is not revealed by what I do when I’m powerless. Character is revealed by what I do when I’m holding the spear.

Anyone can refrain from revenge when revenge isn’t available. David stands over a sleeping king and discovers the deeper victory. The greatest enemy in the camp isn’t Saul. It’s the temptation to become Saul.

And that’s the wilderness lesson for me in the quiet this morning. I can spend years praying for God to remove my enemies. Perhaps God is more interested in making sure I don’t become them.

Before God gives David a throne, He proves David can be trusted with a spear.

And perhaps that’s a test every anointed leader must pass.

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