Tag Archives: Top Ten

10 Ways I Tried NOT to Exasperate My Children

May 6, 2020 Tom Vander Well 1 Comment

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4 (NIV)

Exasperate v. ig-ˈzas-pə-ˌrāt
1. To excite the anger of: Enrage
2. To cause irritation or annoyance

From the home office in Pella, Iowa. Top Ten Ways I tried not to exasperate my children:

Let them become who they are called to be, not who I wanted them to be.
Be patient with their small mistakes and accidents. I make them too.
Be patient with their big mistakes and accidents. I make them too.
Expect progress, not perfection.
Life is short: Enjoy letting them be children/teens/young adults with all the irritations, aggravations, lessons, and foibles. I’m the adult, and should be the one to understand that it’s a stage of life they are in and be patient with it.
Found and complimented the beauty in who they were in the moment, refusing to tease or be critical of them in the awkward stage(s) they went through.
Be critical of their behaviors, never of their person.
Believe in and trust: Make my default answer “yes.”
When angry or frustrated, express it appropriately. Sometimes yelling, ranting, and screaming are counterproductive. Let silence do the heavy lifting.
Forgive them, just as I have (and need to be) been forgiven.

This post was originally published on April 25, 2014.

Wayfarer's Journal

10 Ways I Tried NOT to Exasperate My Children

April 25, 2014 Tom Vander Well 7 Comments

Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Ephesians 6:4 (NIV)

Exasperate v. \ig-ˈzas-pə-ˌrāt\
1. To excite the anger of: Enrage
2. To cause irritation or annoyance

From the home office in Pella, Iowa. Top Ten Ways I tried not to exasperate my children:

Let them become who they are called to be, not who I wanted them to be.
Be patient with their small mistakes and accidents. I make them too.
Be patient with their big mistakes and accidents. I make them too.
Expect progress, not perfection.
Life is short: Enjoy letting them be children/teens/young adults with all the irritations, aggravations, lessons, and foibles. I’m the adult, and should be the one to understand that it’s a stage of life they are in and be patient with it.
Found and complimented the beauty in who they were in the moment, refusing to tease or be critical of them in the awkward stage(s) they went through.
Be critical of their behaviors, never of their person.
Believe in and trust: Make my default answer “yes.”
When angry or frustrated, express it appropriately. Sometimes yelling, ranting, and screaming are counter productive. Let silence do the heavy lifting.
Forgive them, just as I have (and need to be) been forgiven.

Wayfarer's Journal

My Top Ten Posts After Seven Years

February 17, 2012 Tom Vander Well 2 Comments

Next month represents my 7th anniversary as a blogger. I was looking yesterday at my top ten posts of all time. Beyond the usual suspects, I found it interesting to see which posts got legs and generated more views than others. Here they are, from the home office in Pella, Iowa. The top ten Wayfarer posts from seven years:

10. Chapter-a-Day Jeremiah 46

9. Day 19: Something that Never Fails to Make You Feel Better

8. Tom Vander Well meet Tom Vanderwell

7. Day 5: List Five Things that Irritate You About the Same/Opposite Sex

6. Chapter-a-Day Proverbs 11

5. Striking a Chord: When a Blog Post Goes Viral

4. Chapter-a-Day Proverbs 10

3. Day 2: How Have You Changed in the Past Two Years?

2. Speaking of Changes in Life

1. 10 Ways Being a Theatre Major Prepared Me for Success

As I look through the list, it’s a reminder to me of the blog posting mantra that Mike Sansone impressed up on me when I started. Always “link out” to another post, he told me. I can see that some of the posts on the top ten made it simply because they had been “linked” within a popular post. The more people read the popular post, the more likely some would click the link and explore what it had to say.

Blog on.