Tag Archives: Mentoring

Chapter-a-Day

Giftedness and Honesty

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Giftedness and Honesty (CaD 1 Cor 12) – Wayfarer

Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good.
1 Corinthians 12:7 (NIV)

In the past several years, I’ve been surprised to have multiple clients ask me to mentor and coach individuals on their teams. In many cases, these individuals are young people in the early stages of their careers and having their first experiences in management. In other cases, I’ve been asked to come alongside someone who is struggling in their role and system around them is experiencing pain as a result.

I have found through these experiences that sometimes individuals simply need help in managing their time, improving their organizational skills, or learning how to better communicate with team members who have different temperaments or communication styles. On occasion, however, I have helped people discover that they are in a job for which they are not suited. They are a square peg in a round hole, and the mismatch has negative ripple effects across the team and the broader system.

When I discover that an individual and their job are not a good fit, things typically go one of two ways. If my protégé is frustrated and struggling with the job, it can be fairly easy to help them see that it would be a win-win for them and the entire company, if I help them navigate to a different position that better suits their individual strengths and desires. If, however, my protégé is thoroughly convinced that they are, in fact, a round peg that fits perfectly in this round hole job and they have everything they need for the task, my job becomes far more challenging.

In today’s chapter, Paul addresses the concept of spiritual gifts. It’s fairly simple. When a person receives Christ the indwelling Spirit infuses them with a spiritual gift or gifts so that every believer can provide particular acts of service and work for the good of the whole. Paul famously uses the human body as a metaphor. Depending on our individual gifts, we may be a different part of the body (e.g. eye, ear, hand, foot, and etc), but all parts are necessary for the body to function as a whole in a healthy way.

The problem, of course, is phenomenon I’ve witnessed consistently in my experiences in different churches as well as my experiences working with different businesses. I see individuals convinced that they are an eye, a gifted eye, despite being blind to the fact that they are most definitely an elbow. A body in which all of the parts know and embrace their unique and essential role in the functioning of the body will operate smoothly. A system in which parts are ignorant regarding their gifts, demand that they are gifted in ways they are not, and refuse to embrace the ways in which they are actually gifted will continually struggle to exist and operate in a healthy way.

In the quiet this morning, I’m reminded of my post the other day in which I’ve observed the unique ways that Wendy is gifted and has a “many, not me” way of approaching all things. I have different gifts than she does and I operate differently. We have, however, done the work to recognize and know our different gifts, temperaments, and ways of operation. We have learned to embrace not only our own unique gifts but also the unique gifts of the other. When our differences create conflict (and boy do they sometimes create conflict) we have worked to extend grace to one another and consciously choose to remember that different is not wrong. The good things our giftedness brings to the relationship far outweigh the challenges that arise from our differences, but it requires both of us to honestly and humbly embrace our own gifts as well each other’s.

If you know anyone who might be encouraged by today’s post, please share.

These chapter-a-day blog posts are also available via podcast on all major podcast platforms including Apple, Google, and Spotify! Simply go to your podcast platform and search for “Wayfarer Tom Vander Well.” If it’s not on your platform, please let me know!
Chapter-a-Day

A Common Complaint

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Go to the ant, you sluggard;
    consider its ways and be wise!
It has no commander,
    no overseer or ruler,
yet it stores its provisions in summer
    and gathers its food at harvest.
Proverbs 6:6-8 (NIV)

I am on the road again this week working with a client. One of my roles with this client is to mentor some of their young professionals. Most are in their first managerial role. Over the years, I have learned that there is a pattern to the challenges with which they struggle. Just yesterday, I heard one of the most common struggles: “What do I do with the poor worker?”

These are the frustrations and common complaints I hear from managers and supervisors regarding poor workers:

The poor worker is never on time whether it is first thing in the morning or returning to work from break. The only thing to which the poor worker seems to apply themselves is how to appear to be working while doing as little as possible. The poor worker takes thirty-minute bathroom breaks. Poor workers like to smoke because the fifteen-minute smoke break (immediately upon arrival, mid-morning, post-lunch, mid-afternoon) is treated as a smoker’s right on top of the normal breaks. When the manager returns to the floor from a meeting the poor worker can be seen scrambling to look productive. The poor worker encourages a general lack of productivity across their team so that the standard expectation of productivity will be generally lower.

I thought of the poor worker as I read this morning’s chapter and Solomon’s admonition to consider the ways of the hard working, diligent little ant.

At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old man, I admit that I look back on my life journey and observe a stark difference in the average experience of a young person in today’s culture. The economy of my childhood afforded opportunities and expectations for learning a work ethic. When I was seven and eight years old I was shadowing my brothers on their paper routes. At ten, I was substituting as a newsie for my friend, hawking papers twice-a-day in the wards of the local VA hospital. At eleven I had my own route in which I not only delivered papers, but also collected money from customers, learned basic accounting, kept a ledger, and was held accountable for the quality of my work and the accuracy of my figures. By thirteen I was working in a restaurant bussing tables. At fifteen I was working a cornfield. At Sixteen I working retail evenings and weekends. During college, I often worked three jobs while taking a full load.

I contrast this to the “poor workers” with whom my young protègès struggle. I also observe what appears to me to be a great number of young people who are employed for the very first time in their lives post-high-school or college.

In the quiet this morning I find myself contemplating the simple virtue of hard work which was instilled in my early, formative years. I confess, like all young people, I had to be prompted, required, reminded, and scolded as I learned the lessons of said virtue. Some of those lessons are burned into my conscience. And, for that I am grateful.

Speaking of which, I have a full-day of training, coaching, and reporting ahead of me today with a client. My day begins early and ends late.

Time for me to get to work, my friend. Thanks for reading.

Chapter-a-Day

Structure and Flow

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In every province and in every city to which the edict of the king came, there was joy and gladness among the Jews, with feasting and celebrating.
Esther 8:17 (NIV)

Over the past few years, I have served as a mentor to a group of teachers. I will typically review outlines and provide encouragement and advice prior to their message, and then give feedback after the delivery of their messages. It’s been rewarding to watch individuals improve their preparation and presentation skills, and it’s challenged me in a number of unexpected ways. I honestly think I’ve been a better learner than I have a  teacher in the process.

One of the biggest observations I’ve made over my tenure in this role is the importance of structure. If you have a well-ordered structure then your words and ideas have flow. The hearer, almost sub-consciously, follows the flow and ends up right where you want them at the end. Without structure, there is no flow. Transitions are clunky and the hearer gets lost not being able to follow how what you’re saying now related to what you just said before. When an audience is lost they check out. Casual observers rarely appreciate how a great story, song, play, painting, building, sculpture, movie, or presentation is almost always well-structured.

Which brings us to today’s chapter of Esther in which the villain, Haman, has been dispatched. Mordecai, his nemesis, is elevated to Haman’s position and given his possessions. It’s such a good story, but the casual reader does not realize that the story-teller has carefully structured the narrative in what’s known as a “chiastic” style. The author uses the same phrasing in both introducing Haman and then describing Mordecai’s redemption to highlight the reversal of fortune. Commentators Karen Jobes and Janet Nygren help us see the structure:

In the quiet of my office this morning I find myself thinking about structure and flow. The further I get in my life journey the more aware I’ve become that everything is connected. It’s the design of creation. Even a seemingly random sight of trees in a forest has what scientists call a fractal structure. Whether it’s my work, a message I’m giving, a story I’m telling, our weekly schedule, the vacation plan, our meal plan for the week, or how our living room is arranged there is both structure and flow. If I structure things well then things flow better and the results are generally good. If things are disjointed, disconnected, and there’s no real flow, then everything feels unstable and out of whack.

And with that, I enter the structure of my day.

Flow well, my friend.

Chapter-a-Day

The Letter of Our Lives

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Are we beginning to commend ourselves again? Or do we need, like some people, letters of recommendation to you or from you? You yourselves are our letter, written on our hearts, known and read by everyone.
2 Corinthians 3:1-2 (NIV)

Wherever you find kindness, love, and generosity you will find those willing to take advantage of that kindness, love, and generosity. In the day that Paul was writing his letter to believers in Corinth, the followers of Jesus had gained a reputation for being generous toward those marginalized by the society of that day including lepers, widows, and orphans. They also had a reputation of taking up collections for traveling teachers like Paul.

It wasn’t long before con men and teachers with selfish intent began making the rounds. The result of being swindled was that these local gatherings of Jesus’ followers would expect traveling teachers to bring a letter of recommendation from someone they knew and trusted. Eventually the con men began forging those letters of recommendation and it became an on-going problem.

Paul picks up on this situation and uses these required “letters of recommendation” as a word picture. The believers of Corinth were his letter of recommendation, Paul argued. The “proof” of Paul’s ministry was the changed hearts, the transformed lives, and the growing spiritual maturity of those in Corinth in whom Paul had invested his time, teaching, and mentoring.

This morning I’m pondering this metaphor of our very lives, and the outcomes of our lives, being a letter read by everyone around us. When people look at the outcomes of my life, my words, my actions, and my relationships what are they reading? What does my life “recommend” to others? And what’s does my influence on others “recommend?”

Yesterday I went on site with our client and ran into a young man who’d started on the front line of their sales and customer service department. I trained him from his first days on the phone and coached him for a number of years. He was promoted to another team I worked with and then got a promotion to field sales. I haven’t seen him for years. He happened to be in the home office yesterday and when he saw me his face lit up. Unexpectedly he came over and gave me a big hug. It made my day. It was rewarding to know that my coaching has made a small contribution to his success.

I sit here in my hotel room prepping for another day of coaching. I’m reminded of the “letter” I’m writing in myself and others today. I want it to be a positive letter of recommendation.