50 | Wayfarer

He judged Israel twenty-three years. Then he died, and was buried at Shamir.
Judges 10:2 (NRSV)

I had my annual physical this past week. In just over four months I will hit one of those birthdays with a zero in it, and medically things kick into gear with this one. There are more tests, and more questions, and more pleas for precaution. I have the rare experience of having the same doctor who cut open my 11 year old leg to remove a giant chunk of skateboard now sticking his finger up my backside to check my prostate (Sorry…TMI).

So it is that my thoughts have wandered into the big picture considerations of life’s journey in recent days. I’m asking the GPS recalibration questions of life’s road:

Where have I been?
Where am I at?
Where am I going?

One of the interesting things I have observed as we journey through the Book of Judges is that there are Judges for whom chapters are devoted to telling their stories. Then, there are judges like Tola and Jair in todays’ chapter who are mentioned in passing. Tola led for 23 years. Period. End of story. Jair led 22 years, had 30 sons who rode 30 donkeys and lived in 30 towns. Done.

Garrison Keillor, in one of his Lake Wobegon monologues, made the observation that a small town newspaper isn’t really the news. What a small town newspaper prints is just a table of contents to what’s really happening (which will never be printed). I have come to realize that the same thing is true of obituaries.

Having officiated my share of funerals over the years, I’ve come to realize that the two or three paragraphs printed in the newspaper and read in the funeral service don’t really tell the story of a persons life any more than the silly numerical trivia of Jair’s sons can possibly be the totality of his tale. It’s when you sit around the living room with grieving spouses, children, and grandchildren eating a day old donut brought to the house by a well meaning neighbor that you begin to catch a hint of it. Hearing their memories in the privacy of home, away from the public eye and amidst the din of screaming children, you hear stories of quiet strength, simple love, and moments that changed life for an individual.

Tola and Jair may not have had stories that fill chapters in the Great Story. I know, however, that there is more to the stories behind the blurbs we read today. So it is with all of us. Very few of us get more than a two or three paragraph summation at the end of this journey. But, that’s not the whole story by a long shot. The real story is being written daily in our relationships, our words, our gestures, and our seemingly insignificant acts of kindness and love.

So how’s my story going as I approach mile marker 50?
Where have I been?
Where am I at?
Where am I going?

December 11. It’s about time to watch It’s a Wonderful Life again.

When Moses had finished speaking all these words to all Israel, he said to them: “I am now one hundred twenty years old. I am no longer able to get about, and the Lord has told me, ‘You shall not cross over this Jordan.’
Deuteronomy 31:1 (NRSV)

Last night on the way to dinner with friends, Wendy was sharing with me about a podcast she listened to by Donald Miller. The crux of the message was, what story are you trying to tell with your life? She expressed a desire for the two of us to spend some time in conversation about the story we want our lives to tell. I’m looking forward to that.

In less than a half-year I will hit the big 5-0. I’ve never been one to stress about birthdays and aging. It is what it is. I’m less concerned about the number of my years and more concerned with what I have done with the days I have been given, and with my purpose in however many days I have left. Nevertheless, when you reach certain waypoints in life’s journey there is a natural tendency to recalibrate your position.

Where have I been?
Where am I now?
Where am I going?

In today’s chapter, Moses is approaching a monumental waypoint in life: the finish line. Moses had an amazing life. Saved from genocide as a baby, he grew up in Pharaoh’s courts. He was a murderer and a wanted man living life on the lam. Despite his human shortcomings both moral and physical, God called him to confront his past and unite his people. He stood up to Pharaoh, led the people out of Egypt, and then established an entire nation. He gave the nation organizational leadership structure, a thorough set of governing laws, and a monotheistic national religion unlike anything humanity of that day had ever seen. Not a bad resume for one man looking back on his life journey What a great story.

Today, I’m thinking about my own story. I’m mulling over the chapters that have brought me here, and thinking about where I want the story to go from here.

So, what’s your story?